Sales is my Life by Ken
Unemployed for over a year and half way to his 29th birthday, Jerry sat with his wife at the dinner table. She was looking at the want ads.
"I'm a salesman," he said. "It's what I'm good at, in fact, great is the word I'd use. What anyone would use."
"Here's an ad in sales," Jerry's wife said as she passed the paper over to him.
Jerry picked it up and read the ad. "Outside sales, experience a must, personal care items, sales person must be willing to use the product sold. Higher than average pay."
"I like the higher than average pay line," she said.
"Me to. I'll call and set up an appointment. Right now, I'll do anything to get a job." He called the number, gave the woman an rundown of his sales experience and made an appointment for later on that day. Jerry put on his best suit and favorite tie, brushed and combed his hair, every hair in its place. He showed up in plenty of time and gave the receptionist his resume. He tried not to stare, but he notices something about her and can't quite place what it is. He tried not to stare as it's good way of losing even a chance of a job, creeping out the staff.
He was called into an office and sat down. There were two people doing the interview, a woman named Janet and a man named Thomas.
"You have an impressive resume," Thomas said.
"Thanks. I'm made for sales. I lost my last job because the company was sold and they downsized."
"Yeah," Janet said, "this is a tough time for sales."
"It is," Thomas said. "We manufacture and sell the best wigs and hair pieces on the market. They're expensive and in demand. Based on your experience, you'd be a great fit."
"But," Janet said, "our sales force is an outside sales force, and we prefer if they use our product. It helps a lot. Every sales person has said that using their product helps in the sales call."
"I see," Jerry said, "but I don't have need of a wig or hair piece. I have a full head of hair."
"Well," Thomas slid a piece of paper across the desk. "This is our base salary, plus a generous commission schedule."
Jerry looked at the number on the paper. It was almost twice what he made before. "That's very generous. Plus commission you say?"
"Plus commission. A lot of our sale people can double that number with commission. Are you interested?"
"Very. But I don't wear a hair piece or a wig."
"Well, we can fix that," Janet said.
"I don't follow."
"Well, you can pick what you want, a full wig or a hair piece, and we'll fix it so you can wear one. They're the best and I doubt if anyone would realize you're wearing one."
"I'm interested, I just don't know what I would do."
"We'd take care of that. Would you prefer a full wig or just a hair piece?"
"Well, I don't want to shave my head, so maybe just a hair piece."
"Really? A hair piece. Sure, we can do that. Are you available tomorrow morning. We'd do all your paper work plus take care of everything else then as well."
"Then I'm in," Jerry said. "What time?"
"9am. We can do the paper work now then finish up tomorrow. Then start the training for our products."
So Jerry spent an hour filling out paper work, signing paper after paper. He signed paperwork regarding a hair piece, it said it would be top of the line and undetectable.
He told his wife he got a job that paid almost twice what he made before and would be going in the next day for what they called "processing" and training.
He showed up at 8:45, early is good and they took him into a room marked processing. He took a seat at a white barber chair. There was a woman standing there who said she'd be doing the prep work and fitting. There was a mirror but Jerry couldn't see it from the chair. He leaned back as the lady said and relaxed.
"Getting a hair piece," she said. "A lot of guys get the full wig, but the hair piece is a good choice. It's not as hot as a full wig in the heat of the summer."
As Jerry leaned back, the woman began to work on the hair on the top of his head. She ran a device over and over the hair as slowly it began to visibly thin. It got thinner and thinner until Jerry was completely bald on top. She worked around the top of his head and in less than an hour, he was bald on top with just a fringe left. She took a pair of scissors and comb and trimmed the hair that was left. Jerry sat back and faded in and out.
Then she took a hair piece off a stand that matched his hair color perfectly. She measured and trimmed it's size by just a little until it fit the bald area on Jerry's head perfectly. Then, using the little tapes, she applied the hair piece and affixed it to his head. She pressed it down and combed it. Then she trimmed the hair piece so it fit in with his own hairline. She sprayed it and brushed it into place. Then she turned him so he could see it in the mirror.
"What do you think?" she asked.
"Wow," Jerry said, "That's a hair piece? You can't tell. I'm not sure how it will help my sales calls when I'm wearing a hair piece and you can't tell it's a hair piece."
"You'll tell them that you wear a hair piece."
"What if they don't believe me?"
"Then take the hair piece off, show them it's a hair piece." At that the woman took off the hair piece to show Jerry's now bald head and remaining fringe.
"What? I'm bald? I didn't know this is what you were going to do," he said. He felt the top of his head and just felt smooth skin.
"You signed papers about all this...didn't you read them?"
"Who reads all that stuff. Am I bald now? Will it grow back?"
"No it' won't grow back, but who cares, you have a great hair piece."
Jerry's mind was realing. He was bald on top, would have to wear a hair piece all the time now. What would his wife say?
At home, his wife asked how everything went. "Very well, for the most part. They already gave me an advance on my salary that they'll deduct over the next six months. It should help us get out of debt. Just one problem..."
"Well, they want me to use their product..."
"They sell wigs and hair pieces. How are you going to use their product?"
"Well, it's possible to change your hair style to need a wig or hair piece."
"And? Is that a wig you're wearing?" she asked.
"No, it's a hair piece," Jerry said.
"But you're not bald. You don't need a hair piece."
"Well," Jerry said, thinking. Might as well show her. He pulled off the hair piece revealing a fringe that was all of 2 and a half inches long.
"What the hell happened?" She got up and looked at his head. "Are you bald now?"
She felt his head. "You mean it won't grow back?"
She stopped and looked at it. "I like it."
"I like it. A lot. It looks good on you, more mature."
"You mean older."
"No, sweetie, mature. I'm glad they did it. But it looks good. You can wear your hair piece out and at work, but at home, don't wear it, please?"
"Really. And I bet if you look at it, really look at it, you'll like it as well. Some day, I'm sure you'll just wear you hair piece for work. I hope so, anyway."
Jerry went and looked at himself in the mirror. He felt the fringe and the bald top. It was smooth. The more he looked, the more he liked it. He went back into the living room and looked at his wife. "Yeah, I think I'm going to do real well at this job. Don't you babe??"
His wife just smiled, got up and went into the bedroom. Jerry followed, leaving the hair piece laying on the coffee table. Sales records would fall time and again by the new employee.