He didnt have time by Mad Dog and Dave
Jeff and I have been close friends since grade school. Jeff and I were all the time playing jokes on each other. If one was keeping count, and I was, I played far more jokes on Jeff than he played on me. The close friendship continued into high school and joke playing was still important to both of us. One day Jeff said, “Brad, let’s call a truce on this joke playing. I think we are getting too old for it. What do you say?” I agreed with Jim, but in the back of my mind, I thought, ‘if a really good situation would come up, I will surely take advantage of it.’ Jeff is quite a heavy sleeper. You could tear the house down around him and he wouldn’t be aware of it.
The senior prom was coming up and I had an idea. During our high school years, Jeff showed a great interest in hair cutting. He had a cheap pair of clippers and he would cut my hair from time to time. I must admit Jeff had a lot of learning to do, but we didn’t seem to mind what our hair looked like. It was the FUN we had giving each other a haircut. Most of our high school years, Jeff and I had our hair cut quite short - in a long crew cut style where most of the other boys in our class had long hair. You guessed it, we stood out from the crowd. It was the night before our Senior Prom. Jeff had gotten out the clippers to give himself a little trim and before he got to the trim, he fell asleep. We were going to go out afterwards for the evening. When I arrived at his home, Jeff’s parents were about to leave. They invited me in and told me that Jeff was in his bedroom.
I went up to Jeff’s bedroom and found Jeff sleeping. There, on his desk were the clippers all plugged in and ready to go. Jeff and I had let our hair grow out to a long business man’s cut for the prom. I had gone to my barber and had gotten my hair trimmed that afternoon. I could tell that Jeff was ‘dead to the world.’ Of course I couldn’t help myself. The ‘prankster’ in me came to the surface. I turned on the clippers and proceeded to clip all his hair off on one side of his head. When I finished, he had a buzz cut on one side and his regular length on the other. I managed to clean up the hair so none was seen and when I was sure that everything was in order, I woke Jeff up. He is the type of person who will go out without worrying about how his hair looks. I counted on that.
I told Jeff that he had slept through about an hour of our time we had planned on going to a fast food place and then tour the mall. Jeff jumped up and headed out the door. It wasn’t long before we were eating. There were a lot of people looking at us, but I didn’t let on anything was wrong. Jeff didn’t pay any attention to the people when they looked our way. I smiled and waved to the on-lookers. When we got to the mall, we again got lots of stares from the people. After we had been in the mall for about an hour, Jeff finally said, “Brad! Have you noticed that a lot of people have been looking at us both while we were eating and now?” Of course it was most difficult for me to keep a straight face. As we were walking along, I made a big mistake. I walked in to a men’s store to look at a shirt they had in the window. While I was looking at the shirt, Jeff walked by a mirror and happened to look at himself. He let out a loud yell! “What did you do to me?” He was grabbing at his hair and looked even closer. I bust into laughter Jeff shouted, “I’m going to kill you for this! I’m out of here.” With that Jeff walked out of the store.
On our way home, Jeff didn’t say much except repeating, “I’m going to kill you for this.” Of course I was laughing all the time which made things worse. Needless to say that Jeff went to the Senior Prom with a really neat buzz cut. He looked fantastic with the cut. Jeff tried several times to get back at me but I was able to avoid his revenge.
After graduation, I went on to college to become a Science Teacher and Coach and Jeff went to Barber College and became a successful barber. I knew he would do well since by the time we had graduated, Jeff was a pretty good barber, considering.
After receiving my degree, I applied and got a job teaching at our old high school. They happened to be looking for a Chemistry/Physics Teacher and I was available and it so happened the football coach retired that year also, so I applied for that job and got it. The first day of football camp, I appeared with a shaved head. I encouraged my players to have a short haircut. I thought if I appeared with a shaved head, it would be a good example for my players to follow. Some of the players did shave their heads, but most of them stopped short of the shaved head.
A shaved head wasn’t anything new to me. When I entered college, one of my roommates had a shaved head and I thought it was quite neat. One evening while he was shaving a friend’s head, Bob, my roommate, said, “Jeff! How about I shave your head?” I thought for a minute and was always ready to try something new, I said, “OK!” From that time on, during the warm months, I would have a shaved head and let it grow back out during the winter months.
I kept my head shaved during football season and let it grow out right after the season ended. My hair grows quite fast so I had a short crew cut by the time the banquet would be held. Usually it is the custom at the school, to have a banquet right after the football season ends, to recognize the work the players had put in during the season. One thing led to another until the banquet was postponed until late February. This meant by the time the banquet would be held, I would have quite a head of thick, black and moderate curly hair.
The day of the banquet I had so many things to think about that I had forgotten about getting a light trim. By the time I had come down to earth and had gotten ready for the banquet was the first time I thought about a haircut that day. I raced off to Jeff’s barbershop for a fast trim. I thought I looked really sharp in my white shirt, black suit and my jet-black hair. I had a little more than a half hour before the banquet. I was hoping that Jeff wouldn’t have anyone waiting. I was in luck. He was finishing up a customer with no one waiting. As soon as his last client paid and left, I was in his chair like a flash of lightning. I told Jeff I was running late so I wanted just a trim.
Jeff put the cape around my neck and I began reading over and studying my remarks I wanted to make at the banquet. Needless to say, I was so engrossed with the speech I was going to deliver, that I paid no attention to Jeff after he said, “One light trim coming right up!” I figured that by the time Jeff finished the cut, I would have just about 10 minutes to get to the banquet.
Now unknown to me, Jeff had thought about all of the pranks I played on him over the years and especially the one right before the Senior Prom. During the beginning of the trim, I thought maybe Jeff was going a little short, but I had to concentrate on my speech. I didn’t even pay any attention when Jeff lathered up my head and began shaving. When Jeff finished, he cleaned off the lather and said, “Ok! Brad! You’re finished.” I looked up as the chair was slowly turned so I was facing the mirror. My mouth dropped open! There staring me was this person with a perfect MOHAWK!
I almost died. I yelled, “Jeff! What have you done? You have ruined me!” Jeff was standing and laughing like I had never heard or seen him laugh before. I was steaming. I looked at my watch and noted that I didn’t have time to go home and shave the Mohawk. I would have to go like this. “Oh! Man! Jeff! I could kill you.” Now where have I heard that before? I told Jeff I had to really go and I would be back later to pay him. Out of the shop I rushed and got to the banquet just in time. Of course when I walked in, everyone looked my direction and everyone began to roar and clap. I could feel my face turning red. I am sure that they thought I looked hysterical with my Mohawk. There wasn’t anything I could do but to endure.
When I was introduced, the audience erupted! My team was the most vocal. Later I found out that the team thought it was really neat that I came as a ‘mascot.’ I hadn’t thought about it, but our school nickname is the “INDIANS!” I think the principal was surprised with my haircut, but later he also thought my Mohawk showed I was truly dedicated to my job and the young men I worked with. The entire team came to me after the banquet and told me I looked really “COOL!” A lot of the parents also came to me and expressed their delight that I took my job so seriously. They also expressed their sincere thanks! Now I wasn’t going to say anything that would destroy the moment.
The weekend that followed, I got used to the Mohawk. I thought I looked quite distinguished. I knew I wouldn’t keep it, but I received word from one of my assistants that the ‘word’ had gotten out to all of the student body about my Mohawk and the word was that they all were looking forward to coming to school on Monday to see Coach with the Mohawk. Come Monday morning early, the time for a decision came. I decided I couldn’t disappoint the student body. I carefully shaved where Jeff had shaved that Friday evening and made sure my Mohawk was perfect. I think every student came by to make a positive comment as well as a lot of the faculty. Of course there are those on any faculty who do not see the lighter side of life.
About a week later, the Student Council was in the process of raising money for a little girl in our neighborhood who was seriously ill and they wanted to help out. Everyone thought it was a great idea. They had expected to raise at least a thousand dollars. They were falling short of their goal. The captain of the football team came to me and wanted me to allow him to offer up the job of shaving off my Mohawk for money. I thought that was a great idea since I had decided to shave it off myself or have Jeff do it the next time I went in. Needless to say, I did the captain one better. I told him yes provided he offered up his locks for shaving also. He looked at me and said, “You’re On!” Well! When news got out about the shaving, everyone wanted to have a piece of the action.
The Student Council did quite well with the two shavings. I left my hair grow out until football camp began again. When I went out with my bald head, there facing me was the entire team, each with a Mohawk. I felt so honored that they thought enough of me to go to that length to show their appreciation.
I can’t thank Jeff enough for messing up my plans for the Football Banquet. The school spirit is on such a high level, that even the no-athletic inclined students began to show their spirit. I wonder what haircut Jeff will be giving me the next time I find myself in a situation like the one I found myself when I received the Mohawk? I will be sure to be on my toes from now on. I have a feeling Jeff is just beginning his revenge. Oh! Well! It’s only hair and as I stated before, my hair grows back quickly. Besides, it's a lot of FUN.