Shaved and my Brother by MarcustheBald16
Context-I have escaped from my family and am getting my haircut to due to wanting change and oblivion to my old self. I’ve discovered,but not met due to hostility,that I have a twin brother which just happens to be served by my barber.
I also clarify that I am not anti-christian,the christian presented here is meant to be an extreme ‘rotten apple’ and I do not mean to connotate any christian viewers with my story.
Then,after I walked home,I put my suit on,brushed my teeth,used the fridge
and set off on the twenty-minute walk towards the town centre. I had made a decision-my two-inch top and grade six sides were predominantly coming off-I needed to tear myself away from my old life and live and look in that new life.
Very quickly,I found a barber shop I could attempt to try out... didn’t matter if it was bad,I was perfectly happy to go around with my head the colour of an angry raincloud for numerous days if push came to shove. My mind was perpetuating so many possibilities it was actually painfully hard to choose which haircut I should get. After taking some deep breathes in the cold,musty air of a late September morning I decided-barbers choice,hair had to be a maximum grade three at the top and could be a minimum of an absolute cueball,shining so bright that people could hover their hand over to make it look like glass. I swiped my hair back and took a deep breath. Nervously but assuredly,I ambled into the tattered leather chairs,bells ringing being me.
I must tell you that this is not the first time I have wanted to just clip my hair to such extremes. I had always envied people with them and especially during summer trips to the barbers,wondered whether I was going to come out with a trim or with a drastic clipping,always the former being true-until today. This was coupled by numerous head shave videos,where I was fascinated about the courage,ambiguity,neatness that came at the same time as the passing clippers. My skin tingled and my muscles shivered at the thought that I was going to submit to the realms of the clipped.
"Hello lad,new to the area" chirruped the barber,who was trimming the hair of a middle-aged businessman,getting a slightly(ever so) shorter short back and sides with an imposing black quiff,held in place by logs of gel. Respectable cut,not a fan of gel myself,but it looked a eloquent and intelligent cut. However,I was adament that I wanted to try something a bit more adventurous,push myself out of my comfort zone,be bold...or I should say bald,no doubt some fraction of the cut will be what I define as ‘bald.’
The middle aged man felt his hair,nodded with relentless approval and handed over a pound note and some coins-by judging the broad grin on the barbers face as the money was being accounted for,quite a generous tip. Should I?
Yeah,it is only fair. Shivering to the extent I could barely walk to the chair,I smiled at the barber and succeeded with the walk,although slower.
He talked slowly and sweetly,trying to further melt my brain to appreciate him.
"So mate,what do you fancy this very morning"
I took a colossal breath,almost enough to create a vacuum in the room around me. Now or never,trim or marine.
"I would like to go like really,really short,you can choose the exact cut,but it must be under or equal a grade three all over."
The barber massaged my head,which felt rather nice.
"Well mate,that is one short cut,particularly for your age range"
"Then again your Maverick Turner. I remember this with Henry you know"
"Well Maverick,your brother comes in here all the time. Apart from with you,phenomenal lad. Always telling the best dad jokes,the biggest tips,opting for hairstyles that stretched me to no limits,but all the time keeping up such amiable and memorable conversation. He has had all the reasonable cuts you can imagine during his three years here. He was always(minus three years) known for his long flowing hair you know,like rupunzal,frankly hidous. But came to me after he decided to donate to locks of love and get a proper boys haircut."
He picked up the clippers and added a plastic guard.
"Are you sure,no turning back now"
I nodded. The clippers whirred,shutting all gates that could lead me out of this haircut. All my fear was now transferring into excitement.
"Sides or top first?"
"Sides,then I can change my mind"
"Ok,I’ll give you one of Henry’s favourites"
The clippers plunged into my sideburns,the cool air mixed with the warm metal was relaxing and refreshing. All the time the barber was talking about my twin brother.
"Your brother was the engineering type. I mean really into it. He has designed his own cars,his own kitchen appliances,his own moped,his own tools and has even constructed a house that can be plugged on the back of his car with more ambiance than a bulky caravan. Very bright boy at school,however he got expelled when he was fifteen for hitting a boy in the face. It looks like it impeached him for life-he sometimes comes by to offer me a bit of conversation,and you can tell he is self-harming:his legs are almost frogskin in colour,his arms are scratched and he once try to commit suicide by burning himself,fortunately to a change of heart. Also he has gone entirely bald for the last six months to my dismay. But in terms of his inventions......he makes a living out of those at auctions and is not afraid to expand on his skills. Conversing,he seems to have progressed,expanding his vocabulary and prose by the visit. It almost seems bazaar that such a gentle,amiable boy would commit such a puerile act."
He abruptly turned off the clippers and dusted by sides,making me smile and the new hypersensitivity of the almost bare skin,stripped to one-eighth of an inch,or a grade one. So far,while I hated the ratio between the top and sides,the sides looked relatively intelligently crafted with a definite crisp look.
But he was not done. He snapped the guard off the clippers and the sensation carried on.
"Mate,what have you done to that ear of yours"
While enjoying the even hotter clippers,I thought back to my ear. While I thought of the experience as being one of trauma and motif,it wasn’t. You can criticise the national health service all you want,it is obvious that it is oversubscribed and makes careless and avoidable mistakes,but you have to realise,it is actually a good service. My hearing aids were exceptional-comfortable,quiet and the difference between ears was minuscule. I had been able to live a perfectly normal life so far.
"Emmanuel Bohame,my former boss was an extreme christian and criticised me for not knowing the lords prayer"
He breathed heavily like he was a charging bull.
"I literally hate him. I had him as a client you know for about two years,a whole twenty-four half-hour sessions. I’m a muslim you know,and also a former surgeon before quitting after thirty years due to needing predictable hours to take care of my daughters. I’m surprised he paid me £8,let alone £184,for I was the combination of what he absolutely despises-islam and science. Twelve hours of him hurling abusive "You are satanic and going to hell", "Repent from yours sins","Admit science is a conspiracy to try and erase the almighty gods power" among about a hundred more slurs,often different ways of saying the same thing. On the twenty-fourth visit,I threatened a ‘barbers choice’ and he stormed out for indignity and being intolerant of other beliefs. The irony."
Again he brushed off the hairline. He had just gone really short with the clippers ,I could clearly tell by the increased symptoms of the previous shearing-in particular,the breeze of an old age pensioner opening the door with the notorious ring felt as cold as an ice-cream would have on my tongue,and felt fresh. I was now going to have this all over.
I nodded confidently.
With a few passing of the clippers,I felt my insulated head turn into a fridge. My ‘long’ hair was now shorter than the hairs of my toothbrush. Instantly,the revelling breeze made my head tingle fantastically. The clippers made such a meditative pattern,reducing my hair to uniformity. I embraced such a massaging sensation which would hopefully lead to a good look at the end.
And there was complete silence. The barber and the pensioner realised how much of a breaking off point this was for me.
Almost as soon as i’d had my mop,the barber tickled my head to remove all the loose hairs and unclipped my cape. Throughout the experience,I had shut my eyes in order to fully absorb the sensation of the haircut and now I opened my eyes.The barber had taken the top down to a grade two and faded it down to a zero at the ears and sidelines. It looked clean,well-maintained,crisp,sharp and the wavering of the ultra short hair encompassed a tingling which I loved. The inspection of the head(glad to see no obvious blemishes) was while extremely weird,all sandpapery and really tight,felt pretty gratifying and congruent to touch.
"I really like it" I responded with a grin,placing a ten pound note on the desk-a two pound fifty tip.
"Looks great on you,like your brother.Now Maverick,I’m Ahmed. If you like I can sort out a meet with him. If we can get this myth squashed,you will bond very well,you seem to have a similar personality. Deal."
I shook hands.
"Is your brother in the marines" enquired the pensioner cheerfully.
"No" I laughed as I exited the door into the chilly outdoors. Brr. Chilly without insulation,but it has to toughen up and it sure feels nice.