Coronavirus Haircut by RW

---

It is currently week 2 of the Coronavirus quarantine. All non-essential businesses had to close last week, including barber shops and we have no idea when they will re-open. I was due for a haircut a few weeks ago and made the mistake of putting it off. Who would have expected the entire state to shut down. I cut my hair for years after college because money was tight. It's been at least 5 years since I attempted to give myself a haircut, but what’s the worst that could happen? I don’t have to go to work for the next few weeks. If I mess it up, I can just cut it shorter and by the time I go back to work it will be back to normal.

I got up early after making the decision to cut my hair. I didn’t sleep well because I kept thinking about what I was about to do and second guessing my decision. I never attempted a haircut using scissors but have not had a pair of clippers touch to top of my head since my last home haircut years ago. Lately I have been getting a 1.5 or 2 guard on the sides and keeping the top at about an inch and a half. I didn’t know if I was ready for a clipper cut but didn’t think I would do a very good job with scissors. The thought of running clippers down the middle of my head brought back memories and I realized that I actually missed the feeling. I pulled my old clippers out of the drawer and went to the bathroom. I put all the guards in a row on the sink and plugged in the clippers. I attached the number 8 guard and put the clippers on my head. I was so nervous I was actually shaking. I stood there holding the clippers to my head for what seemed like an eternity before getting the courage to slowly push them into my hair. After making the first pass I settled down some. I knew there was no going back now. I finished with the top and put the clippers down to assess the damage. It was not as short as I feared, and I was feeling good about my decision. I got to work on the sides with a number 2 guard and took my time fading it into the top.

I jumped into the shower and very quickly rinsed off because I wanted to see the finished look. I put some product in and pushed the top down so it wasn’t sticking straight up. I looked at it for several minutes and was very proud of myself. I had actually given myself a nice haircut and wondered why I have been spending so much money at the barber shop every few weeks.

I was packing up my clippers when I looked at myself and decided I wasn’t done yet. I was very happy with the length on top and knew I would regret plugging the clippers back in. I didn’t listen to myself and did it anyway. I washed the product out of my hair and attached the number 7 guard. I ran it up the center of my head without hesitation this time. It only removed a small amount of hair, and I could hardly tell the difference. I took the 7 guard off and attached the number 6. I opened the lever to make it a 6.5 because I was starting to get nervous. Again it didn’t remove much so I closed the lever and ran the clippers over my head one more time. I put more product in my hair and was still able to push it down. It didn’t look bad and I was satisfied with my work.

I made breakfast, looking at my hair every chance I got. I really liked it and decided that I would continue cutting it like this even after the barber shops opened again. After lunch I started thinking about my clippers again. I decided that I would leave the top alone but take the back and sides to a number 1. This was a little more difficult than I had been expecting. I was having trouble blending the 1 into the 2 and didn’t have anyone to help me. I finally got it blended, but it was higher than I was planning on going. I didn’t like the way it looked and couldn’t leave it like that. I thought taking the top down a little might help. I attached the number 5 and cut the top again. I still didn’t like it and moved down to the number 4. This was not what I had been expecting when I woke up. I cut more than half my hair off in the morning and now cut it in half again by lunch. I knew I needed to stop but couldn’t help myself. I told myself it was only hair and would grow back and I threw caution to the wind. I ran the number 3 over my head and then grabbed the number 2 without a second thought. Looking at this extreme haircut I knew that I would not be able to stop until it was all gone. I picked up the clippers, took the guard off and let the bare metal touch my head. The feeling of the blade removing what was left of my hair was exhilarating. I stood staring at myself in disbelief with a large stripe of skin down the center of my head. How did this happen? What made me do this? I had given myself 2 haircuts that I really liked but couldn’t resist cutting it a little shorter. I spent the rest of the night rubbing my head thinking about what I had done. My hair was like sandpaper now. I couldn’t even call it hair anymore. It was just stubble. This was not the first time I shaved my head with a zero guard. I did it my freshman year and didn’t remember the incredible feeling until now. I had always regretted not taking a razor to it in college. It was so close to completely bald that it wouldn’t have made any difference. I always wondered what it would have felt like shaved smooth. I decided I wouldn’t pass up the opportunity again. I went back to the bathroom and dragged my razor over the short stubble that had been more than 2 inches of hair just a few hours earlier. I had no idea that because I missed one haircut, I would be standing in front of a mirror completely bald.

I loved the feeling of my shaved head but had major regrets after it was done. It was such a huge change I was terrified to show my family and friends. I was even afraid to get the mail without a hat because I didn’t want the neighbors to see my bald head. I hid in my house for 2 days thinking about what a mistake I made. I was hiding from everyone and realized that I couldn’t hide forever. I would probably have a 1/4 inch of hair by the time I go back to work but everyone would still know I shaved it. I really like the look and feel of my shaved head and since everyone was going to know anyway I don’t see a reason to try and grow it back. I didn’t realize how much I had always wanted to shave my head until it was done. The only thing left to do was shave the small amount of hair that had grown back in the last few days and show everyone my new look. Some liked it, others didn’t. I found that I don’t care what anyone thinks. I love it, and can’t see myself growing it back anytime soon.

---