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The Quarantine Buzzcut - True Story by Buzzedshort
It was a rainy morning at the first month of quarantine, and as many men did I sported a shaggy crop of curly hair down to my ears. I am 18 and have had a strong desire my whole life to get buzzcut, however have only done it once before. It was looking like quarantine was my chance to finally get my dream cut, as it seemed most men in the UK were taking to the clippers and shaving their own heads.
My mum was concerned about the length of my hair, and knowing that quarantine was going to last a while she decided to order a pair of clippers and a hair cutting scissor kit just in case it came to that.
When I saw those clippers come through the door in the post my stomach turned and butterflies bounced around my heart. A pair of clippers, in my hands, finally! My nervousness held me back from grabbing the clippers until one day I was sitting around my room and heard a call from my mum:
"Do you want your haircut?" She yelled from the kitchen.
I froze. Oh god, this is my chance. What if she just trims it? My mum was no barber and probably wouldn’t know a buzzcut from a bob. I got up and slowly walked to the kitchen, acting as if I didn’t want a haircut when it was all I really wanted right now, and all I could think of. I sat down, and watched my mum fiddle with the clippers I was going to let her do her thing first then maybe just buzz if myself - I wasn’t sure, but I was going to let my mum do the honours.
That was when the clippers snapped to life and I felt years of excitement and anticipation grow in my body - she brought them closer to my head and started hacking away. This was strange, she clearly didn’t know what she was doing. She wasn’t leaving a uniform length around my head, instead just using the clippers to take down the length of my hair.
"Mum, do you know what your doing?"
"Yes, I’m just taking down the length a little bit.." she said, arrogantly.
I felt my head and it was a patchy mess. My mum stepped back and adjusted the guard then had another swipe. An almighty buzz sounded and a massive clump of hair fell over my face as my mum stepped back and looked in concern.
"Is everything ok?" I asked as if I didn’t know. Oh god, I was getting a buzzcut. She had no idea how to work the clippers and here I am getting buzzed!
"Yep, it’s just a bit shorter than I thought." She replied and again fiddled with the guard. She was bringing it shorter every time! I don’t think she had any clue.
Again, a massive clump of hair fell over my head, I got up and looked in the mirror to see what damage had been done. It looked like I had a sort of Chelsea cut - she had attempted to leave a fringe but the back of my head was buzzes down to a 4.
"Mum, you can just bring it all down shaved.." I said anxiously.
"No, it’s fine!" She replied again.
I sat down again and my mum attempted to make a haircut out of her little knowledge. I felt my head get lighter and lighter as more and more clumps of hair landed around my cold feet. I looked at the clippers and she had gone down to a number 3 guard and was still not doing a uniform length round my head, just hacking away. I felt I still had a fringe handing down my forehead and was curious to see what this rookie attempt at a Chelsea cut would look like...
My mum stepped back and asked me to have a look. I got up and looked in my mirror and saw a patchy number 3 buzzcut with a fringe hanging down. It was a really rough job...
"Mum, Just give me the clippers and I’ll finish the job." She didn’t say anything, just looked at me with a slight bit of regret.
I grabbed the clippers and strolled to my bathroom, closing the door. Holy s**t, I thought.. I just got a buzzcut. And I’m about to shave it.
I adjusted the guard to a 2 and lifted the clippers to my fringe and without a second though started giving myself a number 2 all over. Patches of longer hair fell into the sink as I made sure I had a even buzz all over and I could feel myself getting excited in many ways as I rubbed my freshly shaved scalp...
I put the clippers down and examined my hair. I couldn’t believe it. A buzzcut by complete accident. I smiled and stepped into the shower to feel the water roll over my fuzzy head.