Henry Got a Baldy! by HenryZ_Z@yahoo.com

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This is my true life story.

Growing up in the 1970s and '80s longer hair was popular with most younger guys. My dad was an old school 1950s guy however so he always took me and my three older brothers to this crusty old barber shop where he used to go every other week to get his flat top tightened up.

Our usual haircut was what was called a "short regular boys haircut." Which meant it was tapered very tight on the sides and back. Very short angle cut bangs would then be greased into a severe side part.

My dad also always requested that we get what were called "White walls." That's when they'd razor shave about an inch of bare scalp over your ears and off your collar.

The good news was that my dad was also very cheap so we only had this inflicted on us twice a year. Once at back to school time and once at Christmas break. If my dad was paying good money for a barbershop haircut he didn't think he was getting his money's worth unless he saw some bare scalp. When they got to high school, my older brothers were allowed to skip the white walls. They could have very short sideburns but everything had to be tapered very tight.

But then around Easter my dad would decide that it was time for our "summer haircuts." So on a random Saturday after my brothers and I had cleaned up for bed (which meant brushing our teeth and stripping down to our tighty whities which everyone wore back then and also wore to bed) my Dad would holler down the hall "ok Boys. Out to the porch! Haircut time!"

We had a screened back porch which also housed my Brothers' weight bench. The first victim would assume the position at the end of the weight bench. Dad would get out his out his smokey clattering 30-year-old clippers. He had long ago lost any attachments they might have had. We'd be stripped down to our briefs. He was in his big baggy boxer shorts and wife beater undershirt tucked in. My older brothers would always go first so I had to sit there and wait in agony.

It wasn't un common for guys to get Buzz Cuts during the summer. No one had air conditioning back then and most guys spent a lot more time outside. But most dads waited at least until school was out. Not my Pops!

If you got a Butch haircut or a crew cut in a barbershop it would be neatly tapered around the edges. Our summer haircuts were what were called "Baldy" haircuts. Down to the skin with a bare clipper blade.

Of course when I went back to school the next week guys would want to razz me and rub my head and say "haha Henry got a baldy!" But I have to admit I kind of liked it. I still get charged up thinking about sitting there in my briefs watching my teenage brothers in their briefs get baldies inflicted on them on our back on our old back porch.

My older brothers were allowed to grow their baldies out over the summer so their hair was long enough for a "regular boys haircut" at the barber shop before school started. As the youngest Dad freshened up my baldy a couple times over the summer. So my back to school haircut at the barber shop was a crewcut or a Butch. A few weeks later before school pictures I'd be taken back to the barber for whitetails and the time would be Vasalined into a very short side part. That's NY haircut in every school picture up through Junior High!

I never really minded those haircuts however. I secretly kinda dug them. I still seek out crusty old barber shops. Most of my adult life I kept a very short flattop with a landing strip. Lately it's a Dr. Phil MPB but with whitewalled sides.

And I still wear old school white briefs. You can't improve upon the classics.

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