CROPPED BY JEAN THE BARBER by M G

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It was the early seventies and i was a teenager. In those days i was a bit of a mod and wore my hair in a mod crewcut style. One rainy afternoon i went into town with the intention of going to my regular barbers for a haircut. When i arrived there,however, it was shut due to a water burst, so i looked for another barbers. Venturing down a side street i came across a rather tired looking barbers i had not noticed before . A sign above the glass fronted shop read. JEAN,TRADITIONAL GENTLEMAN'S HAIRDRESSING AND SHAVING SALOON. The lights were on inside and both red leather chairs were vacant. I had never had my hair cut by a woman before so feeling somewhat excited at the prospect of having an attractive lady cut it i went inside. Much to my disappointment a sixty something bespectacled grey haired lady sporting an old fashioned beehive hairstyle and smoking a long pencil slim cigar appeared from the back of the shop. Dressed in a lemon coloured knee length overall type jacket and wearing a pair of sensible flat black leather shoes i assumed that this was Jean the Barber. Not being the attractive woman i had been hoping for I did contemplate leaving the shop,but she looked at me and said somewhat firmly,
TAKE A PEW IN THIS CHAIR YOUNG MAN, I'M JEAN,NOW WHAT HAIRCUT ARE WE HAVING TODAY.
I compliantly but with a degree of uncertainty sat down in the chair and she placed a long transparent plastic cape around my neck, i told her that i wanted my hair cropped a little bit shorter and she nodded in acknowledgement. She then picked up a set of brown coloured clunky looking hair clippers and attached a cutting comb to them,i did not think anything about it as i was a little preoccupied as her cigar smoke was stinging my eyes. Mercifully she placed her cigar on an ashtray on the shelf below the mirror, thereby sparing my eyes from any more discomfort. She then switched the clippers on which purred noisily and with that cut a strip of hair from my forehead to my crown. I looked in the mirror,this was a lot shorter than i expected or wanted. Jean then steadily but methodically sheared all my hair off using her left hand to guide my head as she did so. Having completed the top section she then removed the guard and instructed me to put my head down, i did so thinking she was going to square my hair off at the neck, but she then proceeded to run the unguarded clippers up the back of my head right into the crown area,having finished the back she moved to the sides and despatched the remainder of my hair onto the cape. After blending the top and sides with her clippers and a comb she finally switched the clippers off, she then looked at me beaming and said,
THERE YOU ARE YOUNG MAN A NICE CLOSE CROP.
I looked in the mirror and felt sick,i looked ridiculous,my hair on top was about a quarter of an inch long and it was high and down to the wood at the sides. Jean then showed me the back with a hand held mirror,it looked even worse she had shaved my hair off at the back well into the crown area ! Finally she released me from the chair and my misery. I paid her, left the shop and hurried home, never to return.

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