Rick and Mike: Two Haircuts that Hurt by Deke Cutter

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Rick worked after school at a small local food store. It was bigger than a quick mart kind of place but smaller than a full-on supermarket. This was 1970 and the chains hadn’t completely dominated the food sector yet. Mr. Andrews was a good boss and a kind man. He knew that Rick’s dad had a decent job as a draftsman at the plant, but with three kids to feed and put through school, things could get tight. Rick’s mom would love to go back to teaching but his dad would not hear of it. So, all three kids did their part. His sister Sally did baby-sit, and his younger brother Donnie did some lawn mowing. This meant they didn’t need allowances or spending money and they even tried to chip in and buy needed items now and then.

Rick did well in school. He had some good friends and the one thing he really loved was basketball. Mr. Andrews even let him have the season off, telling him he could "make the time up in the summer." At 5’10," Rick knew he was not going to be a center, but he was a darn good point guard, and he knew how to hustle. He was really looking forward to his Junior Year season. A month or so before tryouts were to occur, Rick was combing his hair before going out on the floor at work. His hair covered his ears and touched his collar in the back. His bangs covered his eyes when he combed them straight down; in fact, they touched his upper lip. He always kept them combed over neatly and got his hair trimmed up, so it looked good, and his folks and Mr. Andrews never complained. That day, though, Julie, the head cashier said to him, "hey Rick, there is a new unisex salon opening and I hear they are looking for some young men to come in for free hairstyles that would normally cost $8.00."

"8 bucks! That $3.50 more than I pay at the barbers with a tip."

"Yeah, honey, that is why they are offering the deal. Guys in this town need to get up to speed with what is happening in the city. If you like it, you will go back. If not, Fred will forgive you and take you back as a customer at the barber shop."

"Well, I guess so. That would save me some money and I could put toward an anniversary present for my folks."

"Here’s the salon’s number, call them before all the free slots are gone."

Rick waited until his break, went over to the pay phone, dropped a dime in the slot and dialed the seven digits on the paper Julie had handed him. The woman that answered the phone asked if he could come in tomorrow. Rick said that he could if it was between 3:00 and 4:00 because he worked from 4:00 to 6:00. She said that worked perfectly.


Rick told his mother that he was getting a haircut after school and then going to work so he would not be home until dinner. This was not unusual as Rick managed his own time very well. He walked into the shop, a former tailor, and was amazed at how different it looked. A young woman was at a reception desk and greeted him. "Hi, you must be Rick. We know you have time constraints, so go right over there and Lilly will take care of washing your hair." This shook Rick up a bit, but he went along with it, assuming this was part of the reason it cost so much. Lilly was cute and sort of fawned over Rick. She made sure the water was just right and gently rubbed in the shampoo. Its smell and her perfume were really getting to him as was her closeness. She rinsed out the shampoo and then said, "I’m just going to put in a little bit of this conditioner, it will make your hair extra-manageable." After she worked that through is hair and another rinse, Lilly wrapped a towel around his head and gently rubbed out some of the wetness, then gently tilted the chair upright. She said, "OK Rick, let me bring you over to Michael’s station, he will be cutting and styling your hair."

"Hi Rick, I’m Mike." Mike was about the same height as Rick with black hair parted off center and cut sort of like Paul McCartney’s in that picture where he was in that bearskin coat with the one of his baby’s. So, man, what are you into?"

‘I dunno, I love playing basketball. I work over at Andrews after school. I dig music, you know, regular guy stuff, I guess."

"Yeah man, I hear you. So, you are going to be playing for the school team this year?" (Rick said that he planned to.) OK man, you just sit back and let me give you the perfect haircut for a busy man like yourself."

"Rick thought this didn’t sound too bad. Mike seemed like a reasonable guy and he seemed to understand Rick. Then, Mike started cutting away at Rick’s hair. He started on the back and seemed to be cutting small amounts and being pretty gentle, then he came around the side and suddenly half Rick’s ear was uncovered. "Whoa Mike, that’s shorter than I’ve been wearing it."

"Don’t worry man, I’m giving you the latest look for the athlete on the go. You are going to love it. Rick was feeling uncomfortable but reminded himself of the price (free) and figured he would go with the flow. Things continued along at pace and Mike kept cutting and trimming until he got to the bangs. He combed them straight up and cropped most of them off! Rick was left looking somewhere between a Shakespearean actor and the way he remembered Mia Farrow looking when she chopped her hair short after Peyton Place and ran off and married Frank Sinatra! "You are looking great my man. Let me just put the diffuser on the hair dryer and finish you up." It took all of 30 seconds and Mike was done. He lightly brushed Rick’s now short hair into place and sprayed it lightly with hairspray. "Well man, what do you think? Ready to take on the NBA?"

Rick looked at himself, still in shock. He just wanted to get out of there and hide. He looked ridiculous. Maybe one of the theater guys at school could get away with looking like this but he was going to be the next big joke. Oh, my sweet Lord, what were they going to say at work? Would Mr. Andrews even let him work there looking like this? "Um, yeah, it is a different look, excuse me, Mike. I have to go." He got out of the chair, as soon as Mike took off the cape and almost sprinted out the door. He did run the three blocks to Andrews’.

Rick saw that the stockroom door was open, meaning that a late delivery had come in. He went directly to it to avoid having to pass the checkout and all the folks out front. He ran right into Mr. Andrews. "Slow down there fellow, oh Mike, it’s you! I didn’t recognize you. Son, what did you do to your hair?"

"Please Mr. Andrews, I feel like bawling like a baby. Julie told me about that new place offering free haircuts and I thought I could save the money and put it towards my folk’s anniversary gift and golly if the guy didn’t make me look like I don’t know what. I’m sorry sir, if you don’t want me to be seen in your employ, I’ll understand."

"Slow down Rick, it’s just a haircut. Of course, I want you to get to work. Hold your head up and just laugh with anybody who might give you a rough time. Rick thanked his boss and went to his locker, put on his apron and went to work. While he felt that every eye was on him, it was only Julie who actually spoke about his haircut.

"Oh Rick! I love your new look. It is so happening. You look just like the guys in all my favorite magazines. I knew they would give you the perfect cut!" Julie was gushing like a schoolgirl.

"Perfect? Julie, I am going to be the big joke at school tomorrow. This might be fine for some pretty cover boy in a magazine or some soap opera star, but I’m just a high school guy who wants to shoot baskets and find a date for the Spring dance. That guy didn’t even ask me before he started chopping my hair off. Fred would never do that."

"I’m sure that Mike must have discussed the style with you, professional stylists always do."

"How did you know his name was Mike? How did you even know which one I was going to get? Did you set this up Julie?

"Why no, you must have told me his name."

At this point a customer came in and they both stopped the conversation and went to work, they did not realize that the boss had overheard them. When Rick’s shift ended, he headed home. When he arrived, his mother could see his red rimmed eyes that looked like he was holding back tears. "Rick honey, Fred didn’t do that to your hair did he?"

"Oh mom, Julie told me that the new unisex place was giving free cuts to high school guys to build up their clientele. I figured I could save the money on a haircut and put it in my gift buying fund. But look at what the guy did to me! I look terrible."

"Oh honey, you could never look terrible, but you do look different from your usual self. Let’s see what your dad has to say."

Rick’s father came into the kitchen and was told the sad tale. "Well son, I guess it is too late to do anything about it today, so you will have to go to school that way tomorrow and I suspect you will hear some nasty comments from the wiseacres, but you can take that. I know it will be embarrassing for you, and that is hard pill for a young man to swallow. I don’t say this lightly, son, but it does build character. Know that mom and I are very proud of you for all you do and that you even did this for the best of reasons and not out of vanity. On Saturday, you go see Fred and see if he can sort you out. I warn you, though, the way that—what did he call himself—hair stylist left your hair, you may end up with a pretty short haircut. Your coach might like it, though, when tryouts come around. Not that you need any help in making the team."

School was worse and some of the comments crueler than Rick could have anticipated. Joe Larsen, the all-star tight end on the school’s division-winning football team was the worst. "Hey, look at Grocery Bag Boy! He got a Sissy Haircut. Maybe we should just call him ‘Sissy Hair’ or ‘Grocery Girl.’" His other buddies all laughed.

"Real funny Joe, I got to agree with you though, this is the worst haircut I ever got. It’s as bad as the two passes you failed to protect in the game against Central High in October." That shut him down long enough for Rick to walk away with his head held up. The rest of the day he got some good-natured jokes from guys and some interesting comments from girls who were split on whether they liked it or not. But at lunch with his basketball buddies, the guys he knew best, he explained that he thought he had been the victim of some kind of stupid scam and he was getting it cut again at the barber’s tomorrow. "I’ll take more razzing on Monday, but it will be done with then."

The next morning, Rick got up early and was the first person at the barber shop. Fred welcomed him and said "what the heck did you do." Shamefacedly, Rick, again, told the story. "Oh, heck son, that’s nothin’ to be ashamed of. I’ve never known a young fellow more interested in doing right for his family than you. I can understand that. Now hop up in the chair and let’s see what we can do." Once he was caped up and ready, Fred looked over his hair, ran a comb through it and shook his head. "You had such a nice head of hair and took such good care of it, Rick. This guy did cut it well, but he left us with few options. I would have to really cut the side short, you know, skin you to give you any kind of a parted cut. My best thought would be as long a crewcut as I can do and just give it time to grow out."

"Yeah, my dad kinda thought that might be the solution, Fred. Do what you have to do."

Rick sat in the chair, thinking that two days ago, he had a great head of hair just the way he liked it and now, he was about to get his second haircut in 48 hours and the shortest haircut he had had since he was five years old. Then, Fred turned on the clippers and said, "I hope you are ready for this Rick," and pushed his head forward and ran the clippers up the back of his head, clearing away the first swath of hair. As Fred continued around Rick’s head, Rick’s mind was in a whirl. He could feel the cooler air on his scalp and as Fred began to clean off the hair around his ears, he felt some relief that his ears didn’t seem to stick out like some of the football team’s did when they all got buzzed for the Division Championships. The toughest thing was when he saw his already shortened bangs cut that little bit shorter, exposing most of his forehead, although Fred did try to leave him a little bit of length at the front so that he had something to comb over to the side. When he was done., Fred even used a little bit of a new product, not butch wax or that "greasy kids’ stuff" but something softer and just a tiny bit that made the front lay nicely and have a bit of a shine to it. "Well, Rick, that’s about the best I can do. What do you think?"

"Fred, the last thing I would have imagined on Monday is that I would end this week with a crewcut, but if I have to have one, you gave me the best one I could have asked for. Thanks." As he got out of the chair, he reached for his wallet.

"Now you keep that wallet right where it is. This one is on the house. I’m just glad I didn’t lose you to that fancy new place and it sounds like you were sent there under false pretenses anyway. Now get on with your day young fellow."

Meanwhile, things had been happening to bring some justice to the situation that caused Rick to end up with the crewcut. After the store closed Harry Andrews had stopped Julie before she left. He had asked his wife Martha to come down so that he would have another lady present too. He told Julie that he had overheard her conversation with young Rick and wanted her to "come clean." If she did not, consequences would come her way.

Julie looked at the Andrews who had always been kind to her and "cracked" immediately. Yes, she was a foolish woman. Mike had turned her head. She wanted to see the new salon succeed and Mike needed to prove to the owner and chief stylist that he could bring in young clients so he would not have to go back to barbering. Julie suggested Rick and she suggested the major makeover for him because she thought he was adorable, and Mike needed one blank canvas. The others got to pick their styles. Mike told her that if she told on him, he would accuse her of being a lady of ill-repute.

"Julie, never speak of this again, say nothing to Mike and have nothing more to do with him. This is out of your hands now" Harry said.

Harry and his wife went home. His next call was to the Police Chief. They were old friends and Lodge Brothers. He invited him to come over for a drink on Friday night. The chief was happy to join his old friend and was interested to hear the story. "I don’t like this Mike character. There have been rumors of him smoking the whacky weed" and I don’t want that in my city." How about if we enlist Fred and Elmo Williams over at the Base Barbershop in Phillipsville and solve two problems at once. I’ll call Elmo tomorrow and see if he is still looking for staff and let’s go over and see Fred when he closes tomorrow afternoon.

Their plans having been set into place, all that was needed was to get Mike to Fred’s shop on Monday when the shop was traditionally closed. This was easier than expected when Mike, it turned out, had a weakness for mixed drinks served by pretty cocktail waitresses who owed the Chief a favor. Once Mike was too inebriated to even see straight, two kindly strangers, offered to take him home. Mike fell asleep in their car and didn’t even realize that he was being walked/dragged into the back door and the private back room of Fred’s barbershop where Fred served a few lady clients in a quiet setting and where he had a semi-lounge for himself. They sat Mike in the big comfortable barber chair and secured him so that he would not slip out.

Mike slept until 10:00 AM when his two new friends, the chief and Harry, and Fred the barber were there to wake him with the smell of fresh-brewed coffee. "Good morning sunshine," said the chief.

"Where am I what the F…?"

"Well, you see, you were very drunk last night, and we stopped you as you were about to operate a motor vehicle. That is a serious crime in this town. And, when I tried to put your keys back in your pocket, I found a small quantity of an illegal substance there. That could lead to prison," said the chief smiling broadly. But, we are a friendly bunch here and we think we can help you out.

"Please, yes, I don’t want any trouble."

"Well, we understand that you like giving haircuts without getting any input from the client, like you gave to young Rick the other day. So our friend here is going to do you the courtesy of returning the favor." Mike paled and began to protest. "Now, no need to thank us, I think our second surprise will show you how we are thinking about you and really taking care of you. Now we agree you don’t want to go to jail and you want these charges to go away, right? Just nod?" Mike did. "OK maestro, go to work.

Fred, who was still quite angry about what had happened to young Rick was a man possessed. He picked up his clippers with no guard and went to work on the mutton chops Mike had spent so much time cultivating and growing. "I'm going to give you a whole new look." he said as he pressed hard with the clippers and removed the entire chop all the way to the top of the ear. Mike mewled. He did the same with the second one, Mike moaned. "Now let’s get rid of some of this excess length. Clipper over comb, Fred removed almost 12 inches of hair from around Mike’s head, causing the man to break down in tears. "I’m going to barf," Mike cried.

The chief had expected this and placed a small trash can on Mike’s lap while Fred paused his work. Mike proceeded to empty his stomach. The chief emptied it into Fred’s toilet, returning with a glass filled with mouth was. Like a dental assistant he ordered "gargle and spit." Mike did.

Then Fred returned to work. "Young Rick had such nice thick bangs, as do you, you won’t be needing them for this new style." Switching to shears, he chopped them off at an angle, high on Mike’s forehead. Now where is that water. He sprayed Mike’s hair and formed a part on the right side. Then, picking up his shears again, he proceeded to begin to create a fade line high on the sides of Mike’s head. He went around the head, looked and decided that good old-fashioned white walls were really what he was going for and made it happen. "Now, let’s trim this top down and get it to lie good and flat." With that, Fred went to work with his thinning shears and barber shears, leaving Mike with the most barbered 1950s look imaginable. He lathered up the sides and back, shaved them down and put a little Vitalis in his hands and worked it into the lifeless strands left on top which he combed across into a nice styleless men’s haircut that would make Mike look like what he was about to become. The chair was turned around and Mike just looked in silence at what he had become.

"This haircut should serve you well in your new position up at the Army post barbershop in Phillipsville. You will be Elmo Williams’ chief assistant and that means you will be doing a lot of induction cuts and plenty of Army regulation cuts, flat tops, crewcuts and the like. So, those boys will not be allowed too much leeway in what they want. And by the way, I know Elmo will be pleased to see a young barber with a sharp haircut that is going to let Elmo keep him looking sharp with a weekly cleanup just like his soldiers get. Elmo has agreed to this because you have promised to stay with him for two years. You remember when the waitress asked you to sign your bill last night, of course you don’t. Well, you actually signed your resignation letter from the salon. You explained that you realized that barbering was your true calling and you found a job that you gave a two year commitment to. My boys have moved you out of your apartment and up to a little place in Phillipsville. It is walking distance from the base barbershop. I’ll bring your car up in six months if Elmo tells me that you are working well and if I do not see or hear any bad reports about you here.
More about what happened to Rick may follow in a Part 2.

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