I Deserve This by Brown

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It was a hot Summer day I was already feeling sad after my girlfriend and I broke up and not getting the job that I wanted. To make things worse my hair was sweaty and my head felt hot especially under the mop of hair I have. I was barely getting by and lived pay check to pay check with my roommate. I couldn't even find the time to get a haircut and my sadness made me feel even more lethargic when it comes to getting things done.

I sighed as I brushed my sweaty bangs away from my face. I quickly got up and went to the bathroom to get a shower but when I opened the door I found my roommate shaving his armpit hair. He was completely naked as his penis stood erect without any pubes around his crotch. I quickly closed the door before he noticed me.

I waited a few minutes before knocking on the door, "hey are you almost done in there?"

The buzzing of the clippers stopped as my roommate said back, "in a minute I'm just cleaning up."

I waited patiently before he opened the door. He smiled, "the bathroom is all yours."

I pretended to act oblivious, "what was all the buzzing noise?"

My roommate laughed, "just grooming my body."

I shook my head and laughed as I stepped in the bathroom. I locked the door and stared at my reflection. My sweaty curls felt gross, they were about 6 inches of curls on top while the back and sides of my head were an overgrown buzz. It's been a while since I trimmed my broccoli styled hair.

I stared at my reflection feeling more resentment towards my life. I was so disappointed in myself for not getting the job that I wanted and going through a hard break up. I opened the drawer and found my roommates clippers the same one he used to shave his sweaty armpits and body hair. I held the clippers and stared at it. The clippers didn't have a guard and it looked a bit dirty. My roommate probably just shaved his body without cleaning the clippers. The bare razor still gleamed from my roommates sweat and there were even some of his body hair still on it.

I held my roommate's dirty body clippers and stared at my reflection. My breathing became sharp and quick as my hand trembled both with anger towards my personal failures and nervousness from what I was contemplating on doing.

I shut my eyes and held up my sweaty bangs. After a few seconds of shutting my eyes and gripping the clippers with my hand I quickly turned them on and shaved right down the middle of my head.

F*** it, I shaved another strip down the center of my head as my sweaty curls tumbled on my shoulders. I continued shaving my head quickly as more of my pale scalp was revealed.

I mumbled to myself, "you deserve this" as I tilted my head down and ran the bare clippers from my nape to my crown as more curls tumbled, this time towards the sink. I continued shearing off my hair quickly as my breath became shaky.

In a matter of 3 minutes I was bald. I turned off the clippers and stared at the sink unable to meet my gaze towards my reflection. My hands were trembling as I tried to take steady breaths.

I finally calmed down and looked at my reflection. My head is now brutally shorn. All of this hair growth gone in 3 minutes. I laughed at how bad I looked. My pale white head completely shorn with only rough prickly stubble that was spotty. I rubbed my rough shorn head and said to myself, "you deserve this."

I continued rubbing the rough prickly stubble on my head, it sounded and felt like I was rubbing sandpaper. I move my head around examining the spotty shorn head. It wasn't just a simple zero it was a hasty and sloppy headshave. All that was left on my head was prickly stubble some appearing to be coarser than others.

I turned on the clippers to redo the shave but then I turned it off. I stared at my reflection, "you deserve this."

I rubbed my rough bald head and smiled bitterly to myself. Yeah I don't even deserve an even headshave.

I quickly grabbed the shorn hair off the floor and threw it in the trash can where my roommate's shaved pubes and armpit hair was at.

I hopped in the shower. It felt so strange having water directly hit my scalp. I scrubbed my head with shampoo and rinsed off.

The towel stuck to my prickly bald head but as soon as I took off the towel my bald head was dry. I looked at the mirror once again and laughed, "damn this cut is rough."

My pale shorn head appeared smaller without my hair, but atheist my head had a good shape. I rubbed my spotty shaved head and put on some clothes.

As I got out the bathroom my roommate was watching TV and didn't notice me for a few seconds until he turned my way and opened his mouth in suprise, "bro where's all your hair?"

I replied nonchalantly, "I shaved it. It was getting too hot."

I sat next to my roommate and laughed at his surprised expression. He placed his hand on my shorn head and rubbed it, the sound of my sandpaper textured stubble filled the room.

"Bro youre crazy! You had so much hair!"

I shrugged.

My roommate continued talking, "you didn't use the silver clippers in the drawer did u?"

I nodded my head, "I did."

My roommate let out a surprised chuckle, "bro I use those to shave my pubes and pits! And I just did that before u went in the bathroom!"

I shrugged, "it doesn't matter."

My roommate shook his head and laughed in disbelief, "bro I don't even clean those clippers!"

My roommate began examining my shorn head and tilting it down and to the side, "you missed a few spots u want me to help u with that?"

I shook my head feeling a pang in my heart, "no leave it like this."

My roommate looked surprised asking, "but why?"

I sighed trying to keep my emotions together, "because I deserve this. I didn't feel like going to a barbershop or using clean clippers. I deserve this spotty shaved head because everything sucks right now wheather it's my current love life or the fact that I didn't get the job that I wanted. This was my decision to punish myself for my failures. This spotty bald head suits me in this time of my life."

My roommate looked sympathetically at me and rubbed my prickly bald head, "look we all need a fresh start sometimes and I know things didn't go the way you planned but you shouldn't be so hard on yourself."

I nodded my head, "thanks"

My roommate smiled, "so how about I rebuzz your head evenly."

I thought for a moment before saying, "no I think im going to leave it like this... at least for today."

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