By the Chains that Bind Thee (Part 13) by Fantasy Weaver

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Continuation of part twelve.

Final part of "By the Chains that Bind Thee". Please read the previous parts for context.

-Fantasy Weaver.


Note

1: Some foul language ahead

2: Some adult content ahead

By the Chains that Bind Thee

Part Thirteen - End

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He couldn’t sleep.

How many times had he rolled over on the bed, trying to get comfy? Eleos had long since fallen into slumber’s sweet embrace. Yet, Shay still found himself wide awake, eyes tiredly staring up at the crystal and vine-strewn ceiling. His lover lay beside him, one arm draped lightly over his abdomen, chest rising and falling slowly on deep breaths.

Shay gazed passively over at Eleos’ peacefully resting features.

Three months had already passed since he had become a mage of Stars. Three months since he had sacrificed his hair for his freedom.

The coolness of the satin bedsheets beneath his head still startled him to this day, even after so long without an inch of growth.

He was still having the nightmares. Maybe that was why he wasn’t sleeping now. This was the third night in a row he had failed to find rest. Every time he closed his eyes, the fear of what he would see would force them open again. He knew Eleos would be there when he woke up from those awful dreams. He had been there from the moment he had first opened his eyes after the initiation, and had remained by his side since.

Eleos was so much more open about his distress over that night; the night he had shaved Shay’s hair, and the pleasure he had given him. The young mage had come to accept that, no matter how many times he told this beautiful man he forgave him, that he didn’t regret anything, Eleos would always carry guilt with him for the act. But just as he had to accept that Eleos held guilt, so too did Eleos have to accept that, even if Shay didn’t regret his own decisions, he was still frustrated with the consequences they brought.

Accepting those things made it easier to speak. But it made it no easier to fall asleep.

He sighed. His fingers found the handsome mage’s slumbering features of their own will. Fingertips traced the fine line of his left brow, the chiseled line of his jaw. They touched the little beauty spot under his right eye, fingered the soft silk of his raven hair.

Giving up on sleep, Shay moved Eleos’ arm aside as gently as he could, barely rousing the man as he removed the covers off his slim legs.

Eleos did rouse though, when Shay’s weight lifted off the bed. The man gave a groggy groan as his golden eyes parted into sleepy slits. "Mh…Shay? You alright?"

Shay stopped mid-motion in putting his sleeping robe on. He turned to his lover’s form in the blankets, a soft smile playing on his lips. "Yeah. I just need to take a walk."

Eleos could barely keep his eyes open, the call of sleep too strong to push back. "D’you want me to come with you?"

Ah, this terribly sweet man…Shay’s heart constricted with love for him. He couldn’t let Eleos accompany him, not when the man spent so many sleepless nights calming him from his night terrors. No. He gave another smile and bent down, lips brushing the Dark Mage’s own chastely. "I’ll be back soon. Just need to clear my head." He kissed him again, just as those golden eyes closed completely. "Go back to sleep."

"Mh…"

Shay exited their shared sleeping chamber, walking quietly through the deserted caverns of the Circle of Stars. It was late at night, if the lack of people said anything. The stillness of the caverns was only periodically broken by the gurgling of water or occasional gust of wind from the faraway cavern entrance. The faint breeze made the hanging crystal structures move and clink together softly, musical notes filling the empty caves with wind-chime-esque noises.

He didn’t know why he went for a midnight stroll. His lack of sleep wasn’t anything new. To chose now as the moment he gave up on it entirely in favor of this…he sighed.

He passed through the training caves, where he broke that opal staff a month ago. He went all the way to the room he had his talk with Oras, stood at the white tree with it’s silvery-green leaves, listened to the rush of the waterfalls to either side of him. He walked through the torch-lit corridors of the barrier rooms, where recovering mages and civilians alike were fast asleep, where he himself had lain after his initiation.

He didn’t know how long he walked the labyrinth of caverns he had come to call home. Every pathway he took was memorized after months of being here. He walked them aimlessly, hoping perhaps, that he would tire himself out and wander back into his bed ready to knock himself out for the rest of the night.

But no such thing happened.

Frustrated, he took to another cavern, and another, until, lost in thought, he wandered into a hall he had never seen before.

Shay stopped in his tracks. In front of him, a large, carved archway beckoned him forward. His colorless eyes took in the intricate details of the entrance. Black marble, streaked with silver and gold, with many frescoes and low-relief sculptures which showed moons, stars, mages and other astral imagery.

At the very top, was the carving of a woman.

Far away, beyond the entrance, was a turquoise glow.

Intrigued, Shay moved forward without a second thought. What force pushed him into stepping forth here, he didn’t know. But his body went on without his conscious consent, and, too tired to fight himself, he went inside.

As he rounded many a painted corridor depicting the usual Circle of Stars lore and history, his eyes widened in recollection.

The sacred spring.

It was all here, as it had been the last time he had been in this tranquil paradise. The same illusion of a night sky, the same glowing flora and glittering pollen particles that floated around him silently. The pool with its many aquatic plants and blue water lilies, and it’s glowing, magic-infused waters of turquoise hue. Absent were the chair, sofa and tool-laden table though. Burned. Gone.

His heart beat a tad faster in his chest. This was where he and Eleos had first become one in passionate love. This was where his hair had been shaved from his head. This was where Synn-

His vision blurred. Suddenly, he became aware of a sound, a high-pitched, breathless noise. His throat burned. His voice. He was the one making those sounds, those harsh breaths. He was dizzy. He’s hyperventilating- he needs to-

‘Step into the water child.’

Shay gasped, breath stopping completely.

Silence echoed around the cavern.

What…

What had he just…

Shay glanced around in a panic, eyes flicking everywhere, in every corner, trying to find where that voice had come from. Had he gone mad? "H-hello? Is someone in here?"

Nothing answered him, if only the trickling of water in the pool.

‘I’m hearing things. I’m tired. I’m remembering what happened in here. That’s all it is.’ That’s what he told himself. But Shay was still shaking, despite his self-reassurances. Was he even allowed in here? He hoped so.

Still…he glanced at the waters.

Step into the water it said.

He gave one last look around, but the only living thing in the cavern was himself, and the many flowers.

Soft cloth fell to the floor. He stepped towards the pool, feet sliding in its pleasantly cool embrace.

As soon as his feet were in, his entire body begged to take a dip. Having a hot bath in Eleos’ personal spring was all well and good, but he hadn’t had a good swim in a cold lake in a long time. Last time he recalled, he had still been at the SunWoven Order. And after that…Eleos had washed his hair in here. Hair that had turned to ash.

His reflection stared back at him from the water’s surface. The paleness of his scalp still stuck out to him. He’s gotten so pale, staying underground.

Shay took a deep breath, his body shaking again. Having enough of his reflection, he lowered himself into the water. Much like Eleos had done so many moths ago, Shay allowed himself to float upon his back, cradled in the pool’s cool waves. He had no darkness to shed, no black tears to still, but the comfort of the act was a salve on his tired mind.

His eyes closed, and he thought back on everything that had happened to him. The images from his nightmares waited in the corners of his mind, biding their time until he succumbed to his body’s need for rest, but even now, Shay could see them. He could see his own possessed form. He could see the ruthless, cutting gazes of every Elder Mage, the crazed sapphire glare of the High Mage, could recall his caretaker’s words that warned of what his bad behavior would lead him to. He could see that poor initiate, see his own roommates from the Order, how magic scars marred their skin after exams, those terrible pustules on that learned apprentice’s face.

His own body, burning while Synn relished in his agony.

That dot.

He recalled it now. In his subconscious, far away from the pain the initiation had rained upon him, Shay remembered he had imagined a dot, small, breaking through the radiant, blinding white light that had engulfed his form and threatened his soul’s integrity.

That dot had meant everything to him at the time. It had been the only thing keeping his mind from completely shattering under Synn’s influence. Even now, as he recalled it, all the wonderful memories came back to him, of reaching climax in Eleos’ hands for the first time…even ejaculating by his own hand, in the sanctity of his room, back when he had still been an ignorant apprentice, was a sweet recollection now.

Unbeknownst to him, the more he let his mind wander down memory lane, the deeper he fell, the higher he climbed, to some place else. The turquoise waters glowed brightly around his form, but all light that came from this world, Shay no longer saw. No longer aware of where he was, he let himself simply…go with the flow.

That’s how it had been then too. Tranquil, languid, floating along the rivers of soothing energy without a care in the world. He allowed himself the pleasure of doing so again. His body became pleasantly light. The heaviness in his limbs left him, and yet he barely moved.

Was this a dream? He hadn’t had a good one in a while. But here, in this peaceful creation of his, nothing bad came to haunt him. Whatever evil presence lingered in the catacombs of his mind now disintegrated in this realm of night. The light could not shine where the shadows held dominion. Only the twinkling stars held any influence here, and they shone like brilliant diamonds above him.

The illusory sky felt so real now.

‘Open your mind, Shay.’

That voice again. But rather than being scared now, all Shay felt was…safe.

He opened his mind.

Before him, the sky became more than real. It was beyond imagining. The languid river brought him gently through a field of stars. Around him, nebulas formed gargantuan curtains of stardust and colors he could not name, in shapes he could not describe. Astral bodies floated in this void of night, and he was in the middle of it all, body afloat in this ocean of space and time.

His eyes widened. He had never realized how beautiful the night sky could be.

Had he?

Before him, an immense figure stood out in the firmament. She was of light, but not of the harsh kind her children were made of. She was soft like the moon, cradling his miniscule form in her pale palms. Her figure rippled, was tangible one second, and incomprehensible the next. Sometimes, her skin appeared a translucent black littered with colored stars and constellations alike. Other times, it was as though she wore a robe of dust and ice, and it was difficult for Shay’s mind to comprehend the being that held audience with him.

‘Breathe.’

Air rushed into his lungs, ad the form stabilized. She remained in the form of a pale, naked woman, and upon her glowing visage, she had eyes of silver and gold, and hair of rippling black that coiled and reached out around them immeasurably far. The fabric of the universe itself, shining like an aurora, was her.

Her.

Suddenly aware of his body standing within her palm, and aware of exactly WHO it was he was in front of, Shay fell to his knees and groveled in her hands. "Musuni…it is an honor…"

Eleos’ godly parent. Synn, and all the stars’ mother. The creator of humans, the creator of life itself, was here, a ghostly apparition in a realm of his dreams.

For a moment, nothing happened. Shay lifted his eyes, afraid he had displeased the ancient goddess. When he found those large, luminous eyes, they narrowed with amusement.

"I- ah!"

The immense hand that held him lifted his small form up to the Musuni’s face, so close, he could make out his reflection in her shining eyes. He fell with the momentum, and backed up until his back was stopped by her fingers. Nonsensically, he covered himself, trying to keep his naked form from being seen-

And realized as Musuni laughed that his efforts were both useless, and a little funny. What was he doing, trying to remain modest in front of the creator herself? Eleos had been the first to teach him that there’s no shame in his body. He nevertheless blushed furiously, because, despite everything, he’s human, and being naked in front of his lover’s mother is, if anything, a little bit embarrassing.

‘You need not show shame to me, child.’ Shay heard Musuni’s voice in his head, rather than a physical voice that came through her mouth. It did not move, but her lips turned up into a gentle smile that rivaled the stars in its beauty.

"I…" Shay lowered his hands, eyes taking in Musuni’s visage in awe. "Why have you shown yourself to me?"

When Musuni smiled cryptically, Shay couldn’t help but see where Eleos got his looks from. He was his mother’s son in every way. ‘You reach out to me, dear Shay. Not I to you.’

He had? "Forgive me, I don’t know why, nor how, I’ve summoned you…"

Musuni lifted her other hand, a singular index finger larger than Shay’s entire body coming to pat the top of his head with an affection so deep it resonated in a part of his soul he could scarcely believe existed. ‘Those who seek me out do not always do so consciously. But they all benefit from it, in the end.’

Which abruptly reminded Shay of Musuni’s continued benevolence to him, and he quickly began to utter out his thanks, "I-I wanted to thank you for protecting me and gracing me with your blessing, I don’t know what I would be had it not been for-"

A silencing wave washed over him, and although Musuni said not a word, her will imposed itself with grace upon him. Her amused features only brightened further at his confounded stare. ‘I should be honored my flesh and blood has such a gracious soulmate.’

That…wasn’t what he expected. He averted his eyes to his lap, the blush spreading further down his neck as he found himself smiling sheepishly. "I should be the one who feels honored that Eleos loves me…" his eyes turned wide, and he quickly interjected, "I don’t mean that to insult you in any way-"

‘I see no disrespect,’ Musuni offered with a low laugh, the sound making the stars shine bright around them. ‘I have often watched my child live and die and never find a love like yourself to share in the beauties of my world.’

Shay’s brow furrowed, and he leaned forward on his knees. What could she mean by such a statement? "I’m not sure I understand…"

Those shining jeweled eyes darkened with a sadness so deep, the universe itself dimed for a few seconds, and Shay’s own heart ached at the effect it had over him. Musuni turned her eyes to the stars around them, and with a blink, they arranged into constellations. Another blink, and the constellations formed bodies, male and female alike. They floated in the black void around them, surrounding Musuni’s immense body on all sides.

There were, Shay marvelled, hundreds of them. Thousands, perhaps. It was hard to see them all. They expanded beyond his ability to see in this realm. But those he could see, the ones closest to him, all felt eerily familiar in a way he knew exactly how; each apparition held striking resemblance to both Musuni and…Eleos.

‘Eleos, this is the current form my child inhabits,’ Musuni said, her free hand gesturing to the countless forms around them. ‘These are the forms that have passed. They are with me now, in afterlife, away from the pains and joys of their lives on my earth. Each lived to serve as a guide for humans away from the blinding light of one of my many astral kin.’

Shay’s mouth hung open in wonder at the information being shared with him. His lips uttered the name against his will, "Synn."

Musuni nodded slowly, her features rippling with emotion he could hardly recognize. ‘It is hard, as a parent, to watch one’s children bicker. Harder still, to watch them stray. I cannot permit myself to interfere with their lives in ways that would upset the universe. Synn, as you call this one, will, like all my children, receive an ending. They are long-lived. They will outlive you, dear Shay." The primordial goddess lifted her hand to him again, and her finger, with all the tenderness in this world, brushed his jaw with the most fleeting of touches. ‘Though it brings me joy to see than not all my creations stray from their paths. And though Synn may outlive you, you will now live the rest of your existence free of their influence.’

He didn’t know when the tears began to streak down his cheeks, but there they were, and he could not find it in himself to stop them. His lips shook when he voiced his concerns, "I may be free of influence, but the pain he’s caused me and so many others still lives within me. It hurts," he said, a hand clutching over his heart, "It hurts so much. I can’t use my magic because of it. I’m sure that’s why I’ve not been able to attune with anything for all these months. When will that go away?" He turned his grief-stricken face towards the glowing goddess. "When will I be able to use my magic again? When will my…"

That last concern, he could not voice. What was he thinking, saying all these things to the creator? She must think him superficial to demand answers to such trivial matters.

And yet, Musuni graced him with her wisdom again. ‘Human minds so easily remember pain. Do you know why I made it so, child?’

Shay wiped his face, teeth biting his lower lip despite himself. "I…no."

Something both cool and warm enveloped his form in a tight, motherly embrace. Shay lifted his face, eyes widening and shedding yet more tears as he met with a human-sized Musuni’s eyes above him. Her arms, enveloped in a robe of twinkling lights, held him to her bosom with a soft caress. Her hair swirled around them so far, he could not see the end.

She smiled for him. A thing of such aching beauty he cried all over again. ‘It is so when you feel love, pleasure, the mind builds a fortress with it.’

Shay bowed his head, unable to keep himself from falling apart in the arms of Musuni any longer, and he gave in to the need to weep like a lost child. Her hand caressed his bare head, and he found it impossible to not wrap his own arms tightly around her form, breathing in the scent of her, a scent so reminiscent of Eleos he almost thought the man was here with him.

‘The magic I gave the world does not need a focus in which to pass. It needs only an idea. You need not forget the hurt my astral kin has done unto you. You need only recall the good you have shared with all of my other creations.’ Musuni lifted his face to hers, and he sobbed brokenly in her hands. ‘The love you shared with Eleos will shield you, and provide you with the things you seek.’

His sobs were quiet now, as the goddess’ affections and soothing words enveloped his mind in a velvety blanket of comfort the likes of which only Eleos had ever been able to give him. He recalled every night he had shared with the demi-god, and every night yet to be shared.

Musuni’s form pulsed with the feelings Shay was emitting, and she sighed appreciatively, the stars, the galaxies and nebulas sighing with her in a harmonious orchestra that could compare to nothing on earth.

‘A gift I bestow to you, that your life-force be forever entwined with my child’s, until death brings you both to me. May your passion live on together.’

As the realm around him began to dissipate to shadow, Musuni gave his head one last loving caress, and with her will imposed, he closed his eyes.

Her final words rung around him in quiet whispers, "I think red will suit you just fine.’

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The light of the sun illuminated the crystalline snowflakes upon the mountaintop as they fell from the sky. In the distance, beyond the mountain range that housed the glowing caverns of his home, the ocean’s waves crashed on rock and sandy shores covered in ice.

The crisp air entered his lungs on a deep inhale. He closed his eyes, allowing the cold wind to blow through his robes. His dark cape billowed out around him, a sign of his belonging to the Circle. Its power tingled in his pathways as he ordered the invisibility to disperse.

The sun dipped slowly, but steadily over the horizon.

"Little apprentice."

He turned away from the sight, finding the arresting form of his lover coming to greet him on the rocky plateau. A similar cloak flowed around his strong body, in shades reminiscent of that of his long, raven hair. The strands got tossed by the wind, their many golden beads clinking softly together with every movement they made.

Even after all this time, Eleos was still a sight to behold.

"I thought you were going to stay here a while longer," Shay said, giving him a smile over his shoulder.

"Actually," the Dark Mage said, with a sideways grin, "I asked Oras to cover for me while I’m gone. I couldn’t let you go on your first recovery mission without me."

He laughed, neck flushing under the other’s golden gaze. "What, afraid I wouldn’t come back?"

Eleos got close to him, passed his hand around his waist and pulled him to his chest. His nose tickled Shay’s neck, and the young mage smiled as his skin prickled with goosebumps. "More like I couldn’t stand a night without you."

Eleos lifted Shay’s left hand, and kissed the golden, silver-etched band around his ring finger. A similar ring called the handsome mage’s left hand home as well. Though his was a silver one, with a gold design etched along it’s circumference. It was hard to imagine that it had already been a year since their marriage. Shay recalled the day well, how the caverns of the Circle of Stars had been decorated for the event. The whole community had been there, mages and peasants alike, to celebrate their love.

Oras had given a speech that night during the reception, though Shay would admit he couldn’t recall everything. Perhaps he had drank a little too much. Though, if memory serves correctly, Eleos had not been better off by the end of the night. However, inebriated or not, the sex they had shared back in the sacred spring when no one was looking had a place in his mind forever. No amount of drinking could erase those memories away.

So much had happened since then. Eleos was constantly in and out of the order on missions to find and bring people away from otherworldly influences. The villages around their mountainside were prospering, growing and able to house many newcomers. They hoped to expand their teachings out towards the cities beyond. Though, with the SunWoven mages roaming around the continent, it was always a risk to try and cleanse entire communities.

"Well, if you’re coming with me, you’d better know who we’re going to rescue," Shay stated with a lilt.

Eleos scoffed. "I’m the one who gave you the mission, dearest."

"All the more reason you should know then- ah!"

Eleos tackled him into a pile of snow, sending white particles all over the place, snowflakes sticking to their hair in fluffy clumps as they fell together.

"Oh yeah? Take this!" Shay shouted.

With a flick of his hand, ten snowballs materialized around him, and they all honed in on Eleos. The demi-god cursed under his breath as he ducked for cover behind a rock, much to a laughing Shay’s great amusement.

His incessant chuckling cut itself off abruptly when a pile of snow hovered menacingly over his head - right before it fell on top of him.

This time, Eleos was the one fighting to remain composed. When he received an icy glare from his young lover though, he flipped his hair to the side with a cheeky grin, "You started it, little apprentice."

"Yeah? I’m going to finish it."

The two men lost track of time under the entertaining fight they had, both mages utilizing their magic to their advantage in order to dump the most snow on the other. Eventually though, they got tired of dancing around each other at a distance, and resorted to good ol’ roughhousing on the ground, laughing until their lungs ached and jaws hurt.

At last, Shay was the one who sat astride Eleos, with his back to the sun, which had finally set over the horizon. And with its final rays, rays which could never hold any influence over him again, with light that would never take control of his body, and heat that could never burn his skin, Eleos took in his striking form:

Shay’s beautiful silver eyes, shining like the stars themselves, and the deep, passionate red hair, that was a halo of flame around his head.

He committed it to memory. He laced his fingers through the silken tresses.

And with the night falling over them, the two shared a kiss that made the sun, the moon, and stars themselves, weep.

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The End.

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Thank you to those who chose to read the story in it's entirety. Constructive criticism is always appreciated, and by the time this final part is posted, the first part of my next series will be up on the site as well. I will continue with the trend of longer stories, so if you enjoyed this one, please check out my next series.

-Fantasy Weaver.

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