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JO'S BARBERSHOP 3 by Mr. Nice Guy


Hello my name is Jo, recently my barber Dan has told you about me and some of the adventurers I've had in his barbershop (Two customers & Jo VS The Candy Seller) well since that time I have come to an agreement with Dan that every Wed. I can use the Barbershop from 7PM-until unsupervised as long as I clean up the shop when I'm done and keep the shades drawn. (DAN closes the shop up at 6pm on Wed.)

The last few weeks I haven't used the shop due to being so busy at work and the lack of willing subjects. Well today at 615PM as I went to grab a fast dinner at BK in front of me in line was what looked like an over stressed mother with 3 kids, all 3 kids had what looked like grown-out bowlcuts, the oldest looked to be about 14 with light brown hair, the youngest seemed to be about 5 with dark brown hair. I was thinking to myself this might be a good opportunity for me to use the shop today but I didn't think the mother would go for it so I decided not to pursue the subject.

The 4 of them happened to sit down at the table next to the one I was eating at. And I happened to overhear the middle son complaining about how he got into another fight today on the bus because another boy kept calling him a sissy for having such long hair and wish his mother would let him cut it. From the mother's reply I could tell she couldn't for the life of her understand why he would want to cut his hair, this was not the first time the conversation about haircutting came up & besides there was no money to take him to a place to get a proper haircut like he wanted.

After listening to this conversation I now knew there was a good chance I would be able to get her middle son into the chair tonight if not all 3 of her kids. So with a renewed sense of confidence I walked up to there table and introduced myself and explained that I happened to hear there conversation and would be more then willing to offer my services tonight for her 3 kids. After much reassuring on my part that it would be no trouble at all, and a lot of begging from 9 year old Ben she reluctaly agreed to meet me at the barbershop at 715PM with the agreement Ben could get almost any haircut besides a Shaved Head or Mohawk.

I immediately rushed over to the barbershop to set things up and arrived at about 7 o'clock, I still wasn't to sure if I would get to get my clippers into all 3 of there heads or not tonight or even if she would really show up and allow Ben to get a real haircut. 720 rolled around and still no sign of them nor did they call me on my cell phone to tell me that they couldn't find the place. Just as I was thinking I've been stood up at 725 they pull into the parking lot.

Ben enters the shop, followed by his younger sibling Casey. Mom and Alex the oldest remained outside arguing about something for a few minutes. Finally they also enter the shop with Alex obviously upset. I invite Ben to come have a seat in the barberchair and asked mom how short are we allowed to go?

MOM: Well I really don't know any terms or what's in style these days. What ever you do make sure you leave something to comb and don't make em bald.
JO: Did you have any particular style in mind Ben?
BEN: I really don't care as long as you get rid of this girly sissy hair.
JO: Will your kids sit still for clippers mom?
MOM: They never had clippers used on them before but they normally sit pretty still when I cut there hair at home.
JO: OK I think I know of a good style that pretty popular with the younger generation and will work with your kids hair that'll satisfy all parties involved, just leave it up to me.
MOM: OK do you mind if I go do some grocery shopping while you cut my kids hair? What ever you give Ben give to the other one also. (Waving in the general direction of her other two kids) that one might give you a hard time but don't take any gruff from him.
JO: No problem madam I'll have them looking like proper lads in a jiffy. (Giving a friendly grin)
MOM: Yall behave now for Jo. Ya hear me? If Jo tells me otherwise you're going to get it when we get home. (With this she walks out the door)

OK guys now that your mother is gone here are a few rules, we can do this the easy way or the hard way. When I tell you to put your head in a certain position you better keep it in that position until I move your head or I tell you otherwise. If you do what I tell you to do all of you will leave here with a good amount of your hair still in tact. If not I might end up "slipping" with the clippers and leave you with a jacked up haircut or worst yet BALD. Neither one of us wants that so were all going to be little angels and follow directions right? Good.

"So Ben when was the last time you had a haircut?" "Mom gave it a light trim about 2 weeks ago?" "does mom always give you haircuts?" "your entire life all 3 of you huh, So none of you ever had a haircut in a barbershop before" "Has she always kept your hair this long?" "those days are behind you now" "Ok please sit all the way back in the chair, I'm going to use this piece of tissue so hair doesn't fly down your shirt. If the cape starts to choke you please let me know." "Ok are you ready? Lets get rid of this sissy hair then" with that I started combing, lifting and hacking off great sections of dark blond hair, making sure each great 1+ foot piece lands in Ben's lap (easier to gather it up later to put into a ziplock bag) not paying much attention to style right now since later on I'll be evening it up with the clippers. One thing I am surprised of is how healthy and well taken care of his hair is. It's clean, thick, with great volume, baby soft and tangle free. The type of hair any woman would die for. His two brothers' hair from the looks of it seems to be in the same condition. Apparently Mother takes great care of her Boys' hair. I can kind of see why she treasures it so much considering here hair looked a little on the unhealthy side. Though soon there won't be much hair left on these three heads. Nobody will call them sissies again or mistake em for girls because of there haircuts for awhile after I get done with them. "Ok now that the bulk of your hair is taken care of it time for me to use these clippers to straiten it out and start to give your cut shape." "I understand you never had clippers used on you before, see they are nothing to be afraid of, they make a loud hum see but they don't hurt" (while rubbing em across my arm to demonstrate that there harmless) "put your chin to your chest for me please and look right here at your lap" "all the way down" (first pass with the clippers up the back of his head with the #1 blade attached) "no don't look up yet, I'll tell you when you can move your head" (more and more passes with the clippers making my way slowly to the left side) "ok lean your head to the left now" "ok now lean your head to the right" "we're almost done, ok you can lift your head back up now" "pretty nice huh?" "now its time to attack the top" running the clippers from front to back with the #3 blade attached being careful not to cut into the bangs which I plan on leaving 1 inch after all mom did say leave something to comb up there. "Ok Ben we are all done, do you like it?" "I figured you would" muttering under my breath mom is going to think I skinned him, f*** it at least he looks like a boy for once in his life and this way if mom decides she doesn't like the haircut at least she won't have much of a choice for the next couple of months, I'm sure it'll make life a little easier on him at school.

At this time I notice that Alex the oldest one is no longer sitting in the waiting room & has disappeared someplace. And Ben immediately ran to the bathroom to get a closer look at his new haircut I guess. It's time to grab the booster seat for Casey, thank god mom decided to name at least one of her boys with a manly name I wonder if she was thinking about the "Casey at the bat" poem at the time?

"Come on Casey time for your haircut" "I don't care if you don't want one, you heard what your mother said" at this time I walk over to Casey and manually carried him to the barberchair" I notice Casey's hair is shorter then his two brothers so I can go ahead and skip messing around with scissors and go strait for the clippers. Since I still have the #3 blade still attached I start the haircut by plowing them strait into the bangs realizing a little to late that I was suppose to leave something to comb. Ohh well to late now, I can always say that he moved his head at the last second, my hand slipped & the only way to fix the mistake was to buzz the top to a uniform 3/4th of an inch. If you ask me it'll look better this way anyways then leaving that silly combable bumper in the front. "Were almost finished, all we need to do now is taper your sides" changing to the #1 blade I quickly finish up the back and sides releasing Him from my chair. "There is a TV in the back room go watch some cartoons or something while we wait for your mother to show up Casey"

Still no sign of mom, god knows were the oldest boy Alex gone off to and Ben been in the bathroom a little too long. I better go knock on the door to see if Ben is ok, after all the 3 of them were kind of my responsibility to look after the least I could do is ensure the 2 I still have in the shop are safe & stay out of trouble, Alex should be old enough to take care of himself. I walk over to the bathroom door & smell cigarette smoke & 2 Boy's laughing. I knock but get no answer. Next I try the door and find it unlocked, as I open the door I catch Alex smoking & Ben just sitting there. I first thing that comes to me mind is OHH S**T; THERE MOTHER IS GOING TO KILL ME FOR LETTING THEM SMOKE. "Ben go sit go sit in that chair over there and don't move" pointing to one of the unused extra Barberchairs. And grab ALEX by the arm and drag him bodily and throwing him into the Barberchair.

"OK Kid since you want to smoke I'm going to teach you a lesson" "see these clippers, I only used the #1 blade on the sides of your two brothers head, but your getting your entire head clipped with em & I'm not even going to use an attachment at all on the sides of your head. If you think Ben's haircut over there is short then you haven't seen anything yet." "Don't cry, you did this to yourself by stealing those cigarettes & smoking em." "Sit there and take your punishment like a man, you're too old to being crying anyway" with that I skin the sides of his head and use the #1 attachment on top of his head leaving no bangs. "OK Alex your done, I hope you have learned a lesson from this.

Just as Alex stands up from the barberchair mom walks into the shop. Ben runs up to her smiling like a chester cat and pronounces in a proud voice how much he enjoys this haircut and never wishes to go back to his old hair style. Mom looks around and replies we can discus your future hairstyles at a later time, and to me she asks were is Casey at and why is Alex's hair so much shorter then Ben's?

JO: Casey is in the rear watching TV & Alex here was caught smoking in the bathroom so I decided to teach him a lesson.
MOM: Alex is this true?
Alex: Yes I stole them from your purse L
MOM: Ben go get your sister please. (With this Ben walks to the back of the shop)
JO: Sister? Um Mam I think there has been a Mistake made, I thought you left your 3 Boys here for haircuts.
MOM: what are you trying to say Sir?
(Just then Ben & Casey walks out of the back room
JO: I gave all 3 of your children a short haircut like you told me to, you even pointed toward little Casey over there and warned me that he might give me a hard time about getting his haircut. Besides none of your children mentioned that Casey was a Girl not a Boy and you got to admit she does look just like a boy in those cloths.
MOM: Alex, Ben were where you while Casey was being Skinned?
JO: Ben ran into the bathroom as soon as I got done cutting his hair and at the time I didn't know were your oldest boy took of too.
MOM: OK I guess I have to admit that Casey does look a little like a boy in those cloths and now more so with that haircut, but why didn't you leave her with some bangs like you did with Ben's haircut
JO: that was a mistake, he I mean she moved her head as I was running the clippers over the top and my hand slipped, the only way to fix it was to buzz the top down to an uniform length.
MOM: well I guess its only hair and it'll all grow back, how much do I owe you for your services tonight?
JO: considering all that has happened I can't take your money.
MOM: here is a $20 anyhow, you did work hard tonight
JO: thank you mam and if you want I will be more then happy to give your children maintenance cuts at no charge as they grow out. I will even be willing to come to your house to do it.
MOM: come on kids time to go home. Goodbye Jo
JO: Goodbye Alex, Ben, Casey

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