Back in the Chair by Mike V

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Phil was sitting in his room making plans for the night - it was Friday and he was meeting up with friends later to party. He had been doing that a lot lately. He was 17 and had his first car and had been regularly missing curfew. Just then his Dad walked in the room. "Put on a clean shirt and meet me downstairs" he quietly told Phil. Phil looked at him blankly. His Dad repeated himself and then said " I guess you can't hear me thru all that hair". Phil just grunted and went to get a shirt. Five minutes later they were in the car - Phil had no idea what was going on. Then they found an on street parking space almost directly in front of Mike's Barbershop - Phil hadn't been here in years - he now went to the trendy salon down the street. "Come on - let's get this done" said Dad. Phil again looked at him blankly. "Gee your hearing is worse than I thought" said Dad.

The shop was small and they got the last 2 waiting chairs. Phil was hard at work, cleaning up an older man. Soon enough, it was his turn. As Mike caped him, Phil's dad walked over and stood looming over him as he sat tightly garroted in the chair. Without looking at Phil, Dad said - "he needs to become a man today - maybe he will act more responsibly if he looks responsible. A short regular, tapered high in the back." Phil was stunned. Mike turned the chair away from the mirror and started to comb thru Phil's shoulder length locks and he felt the hair on top being moved to the side as Mike combed in a side parting. Then the clippers! Mike plowed up the back of Phil's head then around his ears!!. Then he went to work with the scissors blending in the sides. Then the thinning scissors went to work on top. Then a little more trimming all around. "Wet or dry" he asked Phil's dad. "Wet - slick him down good" replied dad. Phil was numb as Mike poured on the strong smelling hair tonic and roughly massaged it in. He combed what little hair he had left forward, then made a sharp part on the left and combed the remaining hair over and then a nice little pomp in front. The chair was turned and Phil now saw himself in the mirror. He looked like something from the 50's. His hair was just above his ears (which seemed to stick out a bit) and shiny. Mike held up a mirror to show Phil the back. It was tapered and stopped 2-3 inches above his collar. He was stunned. He got up from the chair as his dad took his place for his own haircut. The place had filled up and there was no place for Phil to sit and wait for his dad.

"This place is too small for you to stand here waiting - go stand outside - in front of the window - and no slouching - stand up straight". Phil went out and stood tall as directed, shirt neatly tucked in, hair all shiny, facing the busy street. More than once, several times in fact, cars would beep and people would shout out and laugh and point. After what seemed to be an eternity, Phil heard a knock on the window behind him and turned to see his dad directing him to come back into the shop. When Phil reentered the shop, his dad said "get back in the chair". Phil was confused - "what ? - why "" he managed to get out. "Well at least you heard me this time - you are getting back in the chair because I told you to get back in the chair". Phil slowly climbed back into the waiting chair with the full shop quietly watching.

As Phil was being recaped (and garroted), his Dad said " while you were waiting outside I got a chance to examine your haircut. Now, Mike did a great job - for a start.. but Mike needs to take this up at least another 3 inches on the sides and back. The top looks good but it really needs to be shorter on the sides and back." Phil was in shock and before he could say anything, Mike had turned on the clippers and was going higher - and higher - up the sides and the back. He then had to do a little more scissor work to blend it in. Then Mike was pressing the warm shaving cream dispenser and lathering the sides and back. He stropped the straight edge a few times and smoothly shaved away whatever hair remained. Phil was now turned to the mirror and almost cried. There was basically no hair at all on the sides just about all the way up to the part. Then Mike showed him the back. Literally nothing all the way to the crown.

"Now that's perfect" said dad. "He will be coming in every 2 weeks and this is what I want him to look like whenever he leaves - now thank the barber Phil".
"Thank him for this ?" shouted Phil.
There was a second of silence as the full shop held it's breath.
Phil's dad slapped him hard across the face - "You will thank him and call him sir or it's a full head shave and more when you get home.
Phil mumbled "Thank you for my haircut sir"
Phil's dad slapped him hard again - "Louder and it's- thank you for my excellent haircut sir - I look forward to seeing you in 2 weeks"
And so Phil's new life began.

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