Simon's Haircut Adventures (2) by Snagg

---

Short Hair Required

Simon sat in the barber's chair and let Tony touch up his mid-skin-fade buzz cut.
"Your parents visited you over the weekend, right?" Tony asked as he trimmed the hair on top. "How did they react to your haircut?"
"My father asked if I had lice," Simon replied. "And my mother mourned my cut hair. I told her, Look, I just followed the advice of Japanese organizing consultant Marie Kondo to get rid of everything that doesn't spark joy."

Tony laughed and took the attachment off the clippers.
"And how are your studies going?" he then asked.
"It's all still quite new to me, but I'm slowly developing a routine."
"You're studying kinesiology, aren't you?"
"Exactly."
Tony began shaving a guideline around Simon's head. "I'm asking because I know someone who might have a side job for you."
"I'm actually looking for a side job."
"Then you should talk with my buddy Robert. He runs the gym in the back building. He's looking for a student who can work for him two or three times a week for a few hours."
"I'm definitely interested."
"Then, after your haircut, I'll take you over to the gym and introduce you to Robert."

About 20 minutes later, Robert showed Simon around the gym. Robert was a friendly, smiling guy in his mid-30s, very muscular, with a horseshoe flat top.
"I need someone who can work at the reception desk and show new customers how to use the equipment," Robert explained. "Judging by your build, you're probably no stranger to gyms?"
"That's correct."
"Have you ever created a training plan?"
"For myself and others."
"Very good. Many newcomers need help at the beginning."
"No problem. I can coach them."

They entered Robert's office, and Robert asked Simon to take a seat on a dark leather sofa. He himself sat down in an armchair opposite Simon.
"Can you also imagine being a personal trainer for some clients? And leading classes?" Robert asked as he handed Simon a bottle of water.
"In my hometown, I was a personal trainer for a few older gentlemen who wanted to get back in shape. And I worked as a coach at my sports club."
"That sounds fantastic," said Robert. "If you'd like, I'd love to have you as an employee."
"I'd love to work here."

While Robert was printing out the employment contract, he said, "By the way, I'm glad you have short military hair."
"You don't like long hair?"
"I can't stand long hair on men. It looks messy and is impractical for sports."
"It's a good thing you didn't see me a few weeks ago. I had my hair cut short when I started university."
"I assume it was Tony who gave you that look?"
"Yes. He knew exactly what I needed."

Simon read through the contract. "Hopefully my tattoos aren't a problem?" he asked.
"I noticed the octopus on your right hand right away. Do you have any more tattoos?"
Simon took off his hoodie and revealed a biomechanical tattoo that stretched across his entire left arm, creating the illusion of seeing beneath the skin into a structure of gears, chains, and cables.
"It looks fierce," said Robert.
"This is just the beginning. Over time, I'd like to get more tattoos."
"You're not the only one of my employees who has tattoos. I'm cool with that. Just don't let your hair grow!"

Simon started working there the very next day. He usually worked one day on the weekend and then twice during the week from late afternoon until late evening.
One evening, Robert asked him to come to his office. "I have a small problem that you might be able to help me with," said Robert, opening a file on his computer. "At the beginning of January we'll have a lot of new customers, and I urgently need another student employee. One guy has applied. Only one. But his qualifications are great. He's a volleyball player who also studies kinesiology. His name is Carl. Do you know him?"
Simon looked at the photo on the computer. "Sure, I know him. Not particularly well, but we have lectures together."
"I'd very much like to hire him..."
"But?"
"Well, I told you I don't like it when men have long hair."
"Then just ask him to get his hair cut!"
"I'm afraid he'll turn down the job."
Simon laughed. "So you want him to get a haircut, but you don't want to tell him?"
"It's difficult to find new employees. I have to handle this matter very carefully."
"What do you want to do then?"
Robert took a deep breath. "Could you perhaps find a way to discreetly let him know that having short hair, or more specifically, very short hair, would improve his chances of getting the job?"
"To put it more clearly: I'm supposed to get him into Tony's barber chair?"
Robert grinned sheepishly. "Could you please try?"

Simon's shift was soon over, and until bedtime he racked his brains trying to figure out how to tackle the matter. The next morning, it became apparent that the task was easier than expected. Simon didn't need to think about how to approach Carl. Carl approached Simon.
Simon had just finished his morning swim and was climbing out of the pool when someone called his name. He turned around. The person calling was a guy two lanes away. Simon didn't recognize him at first because of his swimming cap. But then he realized: it was Carl.
"Do you also like swimming in the morning?" Carl asked.
"It's a good way to start the day."
"I only have four lanes left. Would you like to have breakfast together? Or have you already eaten?"
"Just a banana."

When Carl came out of the shower into the changing room, Simon was already dressed.
"I'll hurry," said Carl, grabbing his towel and starting to rub his hair, his shoulder-length dark blond curls. "It's easier for you with your buzz cut."
You may soon have a buzz cut too, thought Simon.
Carl slipped into his clothes and tucked his still-wet hair under a beanie. Then he said, "I'm ready. Let's go!"

They went to a bakery that was halfway between the swimming pool and the university.
"Can I ask you something?" Carl said as he sipped his coffee.
"Sure. Go ahead!"
"You work at the Muscle Factory, right?"
Simon nodded.
"I applied there too, but haven't heard anything yet."
Simon put his croissant on the plate. "As far as I know, the application process is still ongoing."
"Glad to hear that. You know, I could really use the job. I've been looking for a job since the beginning of the semester. My parents can't pay me that much, and I'm constantly short on cash."

Simon ran his fingers over his buzzed hair. Should he take advantage of Carl's situation and pressure him into getting a haircut? No. That wasn't fair. It was better to try to convince Robert to hire Carl despite his long hair.

"Look at me!" said Carl, taking off his beanie and ruffling his hair. "I can't even afford a haircut. I wanted to get a haircut before starting university. But I don't have any money."
"You wanted to get a haircut?"
Carl tried to smile. "Sorry. I didn't mean to bore you with my problems."
"Don't worry!"

The fact that Carl wanted to get his hair cut anyway changed the situation again.
"I might have the solution for your haircut," said Simon.
"What kind of solution? Can you cut hair?"
"No, I've never cut anyone's hair."
"Then what?"
"Well, Robert, the boss of the Muscle Factory, told me last night that he'd like to hire you. But he doesn't like your long hair. He even asked me to get you to have your hair cut."
Carl looked at Simon, confused. "Why doesn't he just tell me himself?"
"He's afraid you might turn down the job."
Carl shook his head. "Unnecessarily complicated."
"That's right. But let's get organized so you can get the job! I could advance you the money for the haircut and you can pay me back when you get your first paycheck."

It was time for them to leave the café and head to the university.
"What kind of haircut does Robert actually expect?" Carl asked as they waited at a traffic light.
"I don't know if you'll like the answer..."
It turned green, and they moved on.
"He hired you, so I guess very short hair is required?"
"You guessed right."
"I had actually only planned to have my hair cut a little shorter, not brutally short. On the other hand, I have to admit that I envy your haircut a little. It's practical. And somehow I think it's cool when a guy has really short hair. But until now, it never occurred to me that I could be that kind of guy myself."

They reached the entrance to the university campus. They had different lectures. Carl had to go left, Simon had to go straight ahead.
"Before I go to work this afternoon," Simon said, "I have an appointment with Tony, my barber. He has his shop in the same building as the gym. I could ask Tony if he can cut your hair after mine. Then you can come to the gym and we'll sort out the job. What do you think?"
"Sounds like a plan."
They exchanged phone numbers and said goodbye.

While Simon was sitting in the lecture, he managed to get Carl an appointment with Tony. Then he wrote to Robert: "Your new employee has an appointment with Tony this afternoon."
Robert replied: "That was quick. How did you manage to do that?"
"I used a tactic called honesty."

Later at the barbershop. Simon had just gotten up from the chair when Carl came in. He seemed a little unsure.
"You must be Carl," Tony said warmly. "Don't worry. I'll cut your hair, but I won't kill you."
"Do you have to go to work now?" Carl asked Simon.
"Actually, Robert wants me to supervise your makeover. But I can leave, if you prefer."
"No, stay!" said Carl. "I could use a little support."

Simon sat back down in the chair he had just gotten up from, and Carl was seated in the chair next to him. A cape was draped around Carl, and Tony stood behind him. Tony ran his hands through Carl's hair. "You're aware that your hair will be cut damn short, right?"
"I'm aware of that."
"I intend to give you a haircut that works especially well for a square face, a high and tight, or more precisely, a high and tight recon. Do you know what that is?"
"Not really."
"The high and tight recon is the most extreme version of the high and tight. Skin on the back and sides, faded very high, almost to the crown. Then a sharp transition to the hair on top, which I'll buzz very short, as short as Simon's."
"Wow!" said Simon. "Because of the very high fade, you'll end up with even less hair on your head than I do."
"Is that good or bad?" asked Carl.
"Neither," said Tony. "The height of the fade depends on the shape of the head. The cut will emphasize your strong jawline. Your already masculine facial structure will appear even more masculine."

For a moment, there was silence. Then Simon said, "I think, Carl, the time has come for you to give your final go-ahead."
"Well," said Carl, "I haven't really gotten used to the idea of having ultra-short hair yet. It feels so audacious."
"Look," said Simon, "there are those scaredy-cats who say to the barber, Not too short! But I prefer to be audacious and say, Not too long!"
"You're right," said Carl, taking a deep breath. "It's better to take a chance than to slam on the brakes. So, Tony, start scalping me!"

Tony nodded, got up, took a pair of clippers from the table in front of the mirror, and chose a short guard. "I'm going to buzz the hair on top now," he said, placing the clippers against Carl's forehead.
Carl stared into the mirror. He felt very tense. Then the clippers began to move over his head. The first long hairs fell past his face onto the cape and slid further toward the floor. Once the first section had been buzzed, Carl began to relax. There was no turning back now. It was best to just let the transformation happen.

Tony buzzed another strip and then another, and Carl watched as an increasingly large area of his head was left with stubble only a few millimetres long. When Tony switched off the clippers, he had radically shortened all the hair on top. Only the back and sides still had long hair.
"Bro, you look like you're wearing a clown wig," said Simon. "Should I take a photo and post it on Insta?"
"Don't you dare!"

Tony picked up another pair of clippers. This time, he didn't put on a guard. "I'm going to shave a guide line around your head just below the crown," he explained. "And then I'll send the clown wig to the floor."

Carl felt relieved as the rest of his long hair was shaved off. You either have long hair or short hair, he thought, but he didn't like having some hair short and some long. Clown wigs, undercuts, and pompadours weren't for him.
"Next time we meet at the pool, you'll be much quicker in the shower and locker room," said Simon, pulling Carl out of his thoughts.
Carl imagined what it would be like to just quickly wipe his head with a towel. It would be so convenient. And so great to be in the locker room with Simon or other shorn guys and know that they live the same kind of masculine simplicity.

Carl couldn't see the back of his head, but there couldn't be much hair left there. And sure enough, Tony soon shaved off the last strip. Below the guide line, Carl now had an induction cut.

Next, Tony worked with guards of varying lengths to create the fade.
"By the way, it would be entirely possible not to make any fade at all," said Tony. "But I think it looks better to have at least a crisp transition."

After the fade came the finale: Tony lathered the back and sides of Carl's head with shaving cream. "Now I'll shave large parts of your head nice and smooth, and then your new look will be complete."
My new haircut is damn close to bald, Carl thought as he felt the razor moving across his head.
For a moment, he wondered if he was ready for this haircut. Hadn't everything happened too fast? Then he pushed the thought aside. It was too late for that. It would be better to try to embrace his new look. Own it, dude!

A few minutes later, Tony removed the cape.
"A clear statement," said Simon. "Long-haired men will look at you as if you're about to pull clippers from your sheath and scalp them."
"I look like a pit bull."
Tony laughed. "Did I forget to tell you that the high and tight recon is aggressive?" He stood in front of Carl. "I recommend you grow a short stubble beard. Really very short. Maximum 3 mm. Facial hair helps anchor the look and prevents it from feeling too severe."
"In other words," Carl said, "a stubble beard will help me look like a sociable pit bull."

Simon checked the time on his phone. "I think we should head over to the gym now. People are starting to finish work and the gym will be packed soon." He pulled out his credit card. "I'll pay for both our haircuts."
"Keep your money!" said Tony. "Your haircuts are on Robert. He's so happy to have employees with badass short hair that he'll pay for their barber visits from now on."

To be continued...

---