Jake's Cleanup by Shanon

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Jake wasn't one for getting haircuts very often. Many years he would only get 2 or three in a year, letting his hair grow shoulder length and then going to the mall salon to get it cut to collar length and still leaving enough to cover half of his ear. But now Jake is going to be 25 and he works in a factory. He sees alot of the 18 and 19 year old newhires coming in with their short hair and begins to feel alittle old and scruffy. He hadn't had a haircut since August and, in fact hadn't shaved since Christmas Eve, and here it is mid February.

Jake has medium brown hair and a very thick beard now. He had noticed that his thick chest hair had started growing up his neck until it now reached his beard. His hair in back was shaggy and collar length. He had even noticed hair growing down his neck and onto his broad shoulders. He knew it was time to go for a little cleanup. While talking with one of the newhires, who had light blond hair and what appeared to be a regular haircut about 2 inches on top and 3/4 inch long on the sides, he asked him where he got his haircut. The young lad replied "Oh, I go to Vic's Barbershop downtown". Jake said that it looked cool, and that he would find the place and give it a try.

That very day, after work, he drove downtown and found the place. It was a very old shop with the barber pole turning, and a VERY old barber sitting in the chair, no customers in the shop. Jake was in luck. He went in and the barber greeted him and Jake took a seat in the chair. This was all new to Jake. Before the barber put a cape on him, he put this paper around his neck and then fastened the cape tight. He combed through his long hair and asked what he wanted done. Jake thought for a while and knowing what kind of cuts he had received at the mall, told the barber he wanted it "real short".

The barber then asked what Jake wanted to do with his shaggy beard. Jake thought for a minute and told the barber he could do the beard too, thinking he would just buzz it down alittle. Jake was wearing a tanktop that day, so the barber had noticed the hair growing on his shoulders, and down the front of his neck and onto his chest, so he asked if Jake wanted him to "clean him up real good"? Jake said "sure". The old barber reached for some clippers, the biggest in the group, they were black plastic, and when the barber turned them on, they made a loud whirring noise. This startled Jake a little, as he was used to the little ones at the mall that made a buzzing sound. The barber told him to relax, he would have him all cleaned up in no time.

The barber started in back, so Jake couldn't see what was going on. He felt the cold steel blades run from paper collar up to nearly the top of his head. He was scared by this, but though of how nice the kid at work looked with 3/4 inch sides and back, so he put it out of his head. (Little did Jake know he was using 0000 blade) The barber continued to buzz up the back of jakes head, to the crown, then moved to the sides. He started at about ear level and again, buzzed up to nearly the crown.

Jake wondered how short this was, as alot of hair was gathering on the cape. Then the barber did something with the clippers that Jake didn't understand. He changed the metal blades on them. Jake asked him what that was for, and the barber told him that was for the top of his head, that these blades were a #2 and would leave ALOT more hair than the first set. Jake felt completeley at ease with that statement, assuming this would leave 2 inches of hair like the kid at work. The barber used the #2 blades all over the top of Jake's head. He then switched back to the other blades again and layed Jake back in the chair. He started to buzz Jake's beard down with these. He went from his chin up the right side to his ear, then he told Jake to keep his mouth closed, and he buzzed off Jake's mustache. He then proceded to do left side the same way.

Then he went to work on Jake's neck, buzzing all the thick hair from his neck down to the paper collar wrapped around him. Jake was confused at this point as these were the same blades the barber had used on the sides and back of his head. So he told the barber he could go shorter with the beard, and the barber replied "Don't worry, I'll clean you up real good, we have to do this in steps". Jake was once again put at ease. The barber then switched blades again, to a #1 and told Jake to close his eyes, he was going to buzz his shaggy eyebrows down some. Jake agreed they may need a little trim, but was unsure of how short a #1 was as he thought that meant 1 inch. He quickly learned by the pressure on his brow and the sound of the "mowing" that #1 must mean something alot shorter than 1 inch. It felt to him like the barber had shaved his eyebrows completely off, even though there was a little still there. He began to be concerned about the length of the hair on his head.

But grew even more concerned when the barber brought out a smaller set of silver clippers, that made a loud "buzzing" sound. The barber went over the back and sides of his head again with this set. They made a sharp buzzing sound as they went over the previously buzzed areas, and he knew he must be getting a shorter cut than he had expected, but that would be okay. He then proceeded to buzz his entire face and neck with this set, so jake knew his beard would look better now. The barber then brushed most of the loose hairs from Jakes head and neck and face. He then removed the paper collar and layed the cape down in Jake's lap. Jake thought the cut must be done, but the barber startled Jake when he pulled the sides of his tank top down from his shoulders onto his arms. Jake asked him what he was doing, and the barber explained that since Jake wanted to wear tanktop, he would clean up his shoulder for him. Jake agreed, and the barber again used the silver clippers to buzz the fur from the top of his shoulders, and shoulder blades. Jake thought this was a good idea.

Then he layed Jake back in the chair again and got the big black clippers out again with the 0000 blades. Jake asked what he was going to do now and the barber told him that he thought Jake would look much better if his chest hair was shaved down below the tanktop line too. Before Jake could disagree, the barber already had a path mowed down Jakes never before cut chesthair. He mowed only the top part of Jake's chest, then again with the silver buzzing clippers. Jake thought surely he is done by now. But the barber produced yet an even smaller set of clippers with a very small blade on them. He ran them over Jake's ears and a little inside them to get rid of the newly grown blond fuzz that had appeared a few months ago.

After that the barber pulled Jakes nose open wide and buzzed out his nostril hair, as deep as he could get inside. Jake is now thinking "wow" when this guy said "Cleanup" he meant it. Little did he know this wasn't the end yet. The barber then produced hot towels and put them on Jake's face, neck, and top of his chest. Jake asked him what in the world he was doing? The barber replied "Haven't you ever had a straight razor shave"? Jake said that he hadn't. The old barber said just relax, you will enjoy it. The lather machine quickly made enough lather to cover Jake's face, neck and chest. He went to work scrapping the remaining stubble from Jakes face, front of his neck, and top of his chest. Even where Jake's thick masculine sideburns had been was as smooth as his chest now was.

He sat Jake up in the chair and produced more hot towels, putting them on the back of his head, neck and shoulders. Once again the lather machine roared to life making mounds of hot foam to cover the sides and back of Jakes head as well as his neck and shoulders. The barber made quick work of scrapping every last trace of hair from all of these areas.

Now the only hair that remained was on the top of his head. Jake wondered how long this must be as he hadn't seen it since the clipper's had mowed it down. After Jake was wiped up and dried, the barber removed the cape and spun he chair around for him to see the new "cleaned up" him. Jake didn't even recognize himself with all of the hair gone.

Only 1/4 inch was left on the very top of his head. He didn't know what to say, so he paid the barber $10.00 and left the shop. He kept rubbing his newly shorn face and head. When he got home and looked in the mirror, he didn't know what to think with his hair gone, not even any of his chest hair was visible above the top of his tank top. But there was nothing he could do now.

The next day upon returning to work he saw the kid who had recommended the shop. He was going to go tell him off for sending him to a place that cut off all of his hair. Jake had wanted his hair to look like the young kids, and much to Jakes surprise, this kid had the same short haircut as Jake. He explained to Jake that he hadn't had a haircut in 8 weeks, but had only worked with Jake for 3 weeks. Jake had assumed that the boy had recently had his haircut down to 3/4 inch, when in reality it had been growing for some time. And afterall Jake did ask him where he had gotten his haircut and the kid told him the truth.

Jake informed the kid of what the barber would be doing to him when he was old enough to start growing hair on his chest and face, and the kid replied, "well, I don't know about the chest hair thing, but that barber has been shaving my face and neck since I started to grow peach fuzz as a teen" Jake and his new friend continued to get "cleaned up" by the old barber from then on, every two weeks.

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