Like a Local - part 2 by Manny OAC Your attempts to avoid negativity are not succeeding! Now you are doubling down with your verbose and condescending review. Manny is one of the most talented and prolific contributors to this site. This is yet another creative and enthralling series. He may not win a Pullitzer prize, but he continues to win the admiration and gratitude of most of our readers. Focus your expertise into a story submission, and let's see how it is received. by ClipperAddict on 15 Aug 2025
Like a Local - part 2 by Manny You misunderstand me; I am not trying to be negative. I just think that the inconsistency in characterization creates a dissonance that makes what could very well be an endearing man in the first part into a man who is likely to have an ex-wife and a child he says he misses but still doesn’t like to spend time with. His shift to being completely domineering is not, as of yet, narratively justified, and I get the inkling that the framing of this story does not lend itself towards being a subversion of what it implies. Right now, the perspective is that of an asshole who is getting his way, and I do not see this as being healthy for the site that the most prolific and beloved writer here with consistently high quality is creating a character that is presumably meant to be related to by the reader act in a manner which is just so impulsive and self-centered. Other stories from the same pen have considered the perspective of the people being disrupted in the past, but as of yet, in this narrative, there is only one-and-a-half people who seems to have any intended relatability, the perspective character and Liam. Liam is also interesting in that he is so willing to be party to this manipulation, but he is not yet developed enough to get any accurate read on exactly where his character will go. by OAC on 15 Aug 2025
Like a Local - part 2 by Manny Imagine tending to the many managers who fall short by haircut discipline, and getting a local beautician to see to those among the female office stuff who spend the day worrying about their flashy clothes and playing with their hair. Mandatory pixie cuts and office uniforms with pantsuits or below-the-knee skirts to keep them focused on their job. This is a Manny Masterpiece. And I see a lot of people here (save one) agree. by Hootney on 15 Aug 2025
Like a Local - part 2 by Manny Overly Analytical Commenter you certainly picked the right name. Given your obviously superior writing why not put your energy into a story rather than wasting your talent on a condescending critique. by ClipperAddict on 15 Aug 2025
Like a Local - part 2 by Manny There is some interesting characterization here for the nameless protagonist, who I’ll call Patrick. He both wants to enforce a code of ethics, and yet does something exceptionally unethical in his blatant favoritism, while apparently being very quick to reshape his entire internal hierarchy of men based in part on something relatively minor that happened to him the previous day, with him even going as far as to lie about what occurred for what is presumably his own titillation. I am certainly interested in seeing how this advances, but currently, Patrick is a character who has no internal consistency.
I’m willing to suspend my disbelief that women somehow are not present in either the factory’s employees or in the management, but this, I dare say, unstable man being completely unaccountable for anything he does, and making thinly-veiled threats like this, is certainly something that tests the limits. I’m not trying to be overly analytical, but I legitimately cannot think of a time when the dynamics present in this chapter would ever be present in a non-fictitious environment.
The sort of fantasy present on this site tends to be more of a sexual nature, but the insertion of Trump’s name into this narrative as part of the characterization of Patrick makes it almost read as a shameless power fantasy before anything else, with the coding of the characters being along political lines becoming very conspicuous. If I were to parody this, it would be a flag factory that goes from making gay pride flags to making American flags, but like, the kinds that break flag code by adding miscellaneous iconography that you can buy on Amazon.
The first part creates an interesting setup for a total transformation of both Patrick and the factory’s culture, in which discipline could be woven from chaos, but the way in which the protagonist acts is less weaving and more just randomly tying knots in the fabric. If this were built up to more, then it would make sense, but as it stands, this second part retroactively made him into an almost manic "disruptor"-type, who thinks firing a selection of experienced workers who he has grievances against would greatly improve the culture without any work to fill the power vacuum which that would create. by OverlyAnalyticalCommenter on 15 Aug 2025
Bien pelado para el verano by Davide Hazlo! Intenta un fade alto y nos cuentas (: by Fadeguy95 on 15 Aug 2025
Sister Takes Charge of Haircut by Luck Nice story! I think with some editing and better organization a second part where Sarah takes Rick back to the barbershop for an even shorter haircut would be great. by Sam on 15 Aug 2025
Buy a hair clipper by July It's nice when a mom or dad decides to save money buying a haircutting kit so they can cut their kids hair at home. Although it is definitely a learning process figuring out how to properly use the clippers it does get easier over time. It's great that she also cut her husband's hair with the clippers after she cut her sons' hair. by Sam on 15 Aug 2025
Like a Local - part 2 by Manny “I gave a Trump-like power handshake to emphasize who held the cards" … yikes 😬 by Fontaine on 14 Aug 2025
Beginners Luck by Anonymous Oh, if only I had had the chance to experience a shaved head as a kid! My parents weren’t against them but dad with his comb over, certainly never gave me or even asked me if I wanted a summer buzz cut or baldy. If only I had been with my cousins when they were getting shaved down to nothing I could’ve joined them. Had I had that chance, I think I would’ve been a permanent baldy convert much earlier in life.
Funny thing is all my cousins who were buzzed down as kids all have reasonably long hair and me, who always had the longer hair is the committed head shaver (fortunately I really don’t have any options now anyway as my MPB is much more advanced than my dad’s was).
Oh, the thought of getting my head shaved as a kid. So wish I had experienced that! by Pauldy on 14 Aug 2025
